


X Amount Of Times Max & Nev Kissed And One Time They Didn't.

by catfishkid



Series: Catfish: The Max & Nev Collection [1]
Category: Catfish: The TV Show
Genre: Aww, Catfish - Freeform, Cute, M/M, Romance, kiss, max joseph - Freeform, nev schulman - Freeform, starts from their first kiss, they belong together okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2018-12-23 19:06:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 26,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11996097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catfishkid/pseuds/catfishkid
Summary: Does exactly what it says on the tin! Set through various times in their life from pre Catfish to the present. Now complete at 6 chapters! (well 8 as #6 comes in three parts :D)





	1. ONE

_August 27th 2004_

_Manhattan, New York City_

_Rel Schulman's apartment._

Life was good for Max Joseph at the moment. He'd just graduated from an Ivy League college and landed a great internship at a major film making company. His biggest worry was when his hair was going to go completely grey.

In fact it wasn’t any more or any less than good and that's just how he liked it. He knew what was coming, he needed that sort of stability in his life. Uncertainty brought out the worst of his anxiety which no amount of counselling could change.

To make things even sweeter he was currently at his best friend Rel's apartment with quite a few other old acquaintances. It was a cross between a chill gathering and a full blown party. Max hadn't seen Rel properly in almost a year, the occasional catch up during school breaks when Max would migrate back to New York, where Rel stayed to attend college, but they'd both been so busy with their final year work loads that the catch ups were fleeting if that. So this evening was nice, being able to hang out with his dear friend before moving out to LA indefinitely.

"This place is amazing," said Max as he walked around the living area and into the open plan kitchen to pick up a beer.

"I know right," Rel agreed, picking up his own beer. "Two bedrooms, decent size, nice area. Good place to start."

An excellent place to start more like, Max thought. To say he was jealous would be an understatement, they were the same age yet Rel was able to afford to rent this beautiful two bedroom apartment in Upper East Side Manhattan. Whilst if it wasn't for the fact he still had a room at his parents, Max would be couch surfing or stuck in a flat share with about 6 other people to make it affordable. He couldn't knock Rel though, unlike himself who'd let loose and indulged in the partying life style around studying, Rel had been working hard and saving. Max was determined to catch up soon though, that's the way it had always been between the two budding filmmakers. The friendly rivalry brought out the best in their work.

Max didn't think to ask if Rel had a flatmate when he mentioned two bedrooms, but half an hour into the evening his non existent question was answered. Rel's little brother, Nev, came bounding into the apartment slamming the door behind him. Momentarily all eyes turned to him whilst he just gave a feeble smile before ducking over to the kitchen.

He took one of the beers on the side and then spotted his brother and Max. On his way over to them he kicked his shoes off and dumped his rucksack by the side of the sofa like a teenager who'd just got home from school.

"How many times have I told you to put your belongings in your room?" Rel said to him, "especially when we have guests over."

"Fine mom," Nev rolled his eyes, but done as he was told. Flashing a massive smile at Max as he picked his stuff back up and disappeared down the hall.

Same old Nev, Max thought, but still somehow different. He seemed to have the same annoying attitude, but the make over had done him well though. The last time Max had seen him was about two years ago at Max's 20th birthday get together. Nev was barely 18 then, wearing over sized clothes on his lanky frame, shaggy black hair and the ugliest glasses Max had ever seen. He was still lanky, but his clothes fitted better, the glasses were nowhere to be seen and hair had had a much needed cut.

"Don't let the makeover fool you." Rel elbowed him suddenly, making him jump, wondering if he'd been caught staring. "Remember he was allowed to retake senior year?"

"Uh-huh."

"Well, he got kicked out again."

"Really? Why?"

"Same reasons. Disruptive, doesn't pay attention, smart mouth and picks fights. Plus he got caught with a fuck load of weed which he insisted was for personal use. Lucky he didn't get arrested, no one would believe that much was for personal use and not dealing." Rel sighed. "I knew he was driving mom and dad mad so I said he could stay here on the stipulation he got a job and contribute."

"And has he?"

"Reluctantly, pizzeria downtown. He reckons he's going to go to college eventually. Good luck without a high school diploma even."

Max was about to comment about how Nev was a determined guy and gave it his all when he put his mind to it and actually focused, but his words would've fallen on deaf ears as Rel was beckoning him over to the kitchen where some sort of shot drinking competition was happening.

About an hour passed quickly, Max didn't even notice Nev return to the party. He was too busy making small talk with people and doing his best to pretend he was taking drags from many of the joints being passed around. He'd learnt the hard way that weed plus alcohol was not a good mix for him. A couple of girls Max was chatting too eventually offered him the blunt they kept passing back and forth to each other, although he hadn't actually seen either of them smoke it yet. It was just burning out, but he knew if he took it they'd be waiting for him to have some and hand it back. He made some lame excuse about getting another drink first and escaped to the kitchen.

He forced the last of his warm flat Budweiser down whilst he browsed the bottles on the counter; all that was left was a mixture of wine, spirits and Bud Lights. He hated Bud Light. He decided to cheekily check the fridge to too see if Rel had any better options stashed.

Bingo!

There was a couple of Cors six packs stashed in the bottom. He pulled two cans out, he knew Rel wouldn't mind.

"He'll kill you Maxie."

Max jumped and slammed the fridge door shut, Nev was standing there with a giant grin on his face. "Don't do that bro," Max said.

"Honestly, Rel hates it when I touch his beloved Cors."

"That's because you're you and you're underage."

Nev rolled his eyes. "I'm a fully grown adult now." He took one of the bottles off Max, opened it against the edge of the kitchen counter, handed it back, took the other one to do the same, but kept it for himself to drink. "I have a adult job with adult responsibilities and if I want to indulge in a beer then I shall."

"Fair enough." Max couldn't really take the moral high ground, he had started drinking when he was 17.

"Hey, you wanna see some cool views?" Nev asked with a massive grin on his face.

"Erm, yeah sure." Max nodded, a bit taken aback by the sudden question. Before he could ask what Nev meant the younger boy was grabbing by the wrist and dragging him down the hall, everyone was too busy drinking, smoking, dancing or making out to even notice.

Nev took him into the room at the end of the hall, closing the door behind them. The moment the light was switched on Max knew that this tidy and minimalistic room definitely wasn't Nev's. Nev sat on the side of the bed and spread his arms. "I'm the view Maxie, have your wicked way."

"Oh..." Max choked on his beer and almost dropped the bottle and Nev started laughing.

"The look on your face man. As if you thought I was serious, you're so not my type of guy anyway."

Max raised an eyebrow, Nev had a 'type' of man? Or was he just joking? Last he knew Nev was girl obsessed, completely hopeless with them, but obsessed nonetheless. A lot could change in two years though not that he it mattered, he wasn't homophobic. If Nev liked guys or if he liked girls or if he liked both then that was cool. For all Max knew in two years time he himself could be gay, anything could happen. In fact maybe he was now, he'd never really thought about it.

“Oh god,” he muttered almost silently. If he was questioning his sexuality the alcohol was definitely getting to him and he was doing that thing where his brain thought too fast for him to comprehend everything and was he checking out Nev's ass? He blinked and diverted his eyes, but they instantly rerouted back.

Damn, he was checking out Nev's ass.

No he wasn't. It was just his stupid intoxicated mind trying to trick him. That's what it was. None of this was voluntary. He completely missed what Nev had been saying to him, but was brought back to reality when the cool air hit him. Curtains had been pulled back revealing a small balcony and Nev was standing on it waiting for him. When Max stepped outside he instantly knew what Nev meant about 'cool views'. They could see pretty much the whole of Manhattan illuminated from here.

"This is-"

"-amazing."

"I was going to go for gorgeous, but amazing works too."

"When Rel let's me on here, or when he doesn't know, I usually take photos. It makes a beautiful shot. I'd like to get a series of photos in the same position from sunrise to sunset. That would be cool, I want to save up for a fancier camera, one of those DSLRs that has a time lapse function..."

Nev got lost in himself talking about this camera he wanted leading on to the college he wanted to go to and study photography, maybe even dance too. It was nice to hear, Max wondered if he told Rel or his parents this stuff, surely they'd be more supportive if they heard him talk like this despite all the trouble he'd caused before. There was no hiding the passion Nev had for photography, it rivaled Max's own for filmmaking.

"Were you listening to any of that, Maxie?"

"Yeah," Max lied, well sort of lied. It was hard to keep up with Nev when he was on a roll. "Also, it's Max, please."

"Whatever you say Maxwell." Nev winked and swigged his beer. "Hey this would be well romantic don't you think? Maybe this is how Rel is always getting girls back, by enticing them with A+ views."

"You think?"

"What, that it's romantic? Or that Rel's always bringing girls back?"

Max laughed. "That it's romantic."

"Totally! Could you imagine cooking that special someone a nice homemade meal, then bringing them out here for a glass of wine, nice conversation and then perhaps move it to the bedroom."

Max couldn't argue with that. "So have you got a special someone?" He didn't know why he asked that, it sounded deep, too deep. He didn't have to ask that, these were not the sort of conversations he had with Rel Schulman's little brother. It was definitely this beer, he shouldn't mix his brand of drinks.

"Not at the moment. How about you?"

"Same, no one at the moment, but I'm moving out to LA soon for my internship. Who knows who I'll meet."

"That's one way to look at it. There are so many guys and girls out there, the possibilities are endless. Who knows who you'll end up with."

"Guys and girls," Max mouthed to himself. He definitely said guys, he had heard the word guys come out of Nev’s mouth. "Oh, you like guys then?" Max couldn't help but ask, he was curious. He tried to make his question sound casual although he was certain it sounded awkward as hell, it didn't seem to bother Nev though.

"I've never dated a guy, but I'd be lying if I said there wasn't any guys I've found attractive like really mind blowing sort of attractive because damn I have."

"Wow," Max mentally kicked himself, "I don't mean wow, I mean like cool. It's cool you know, if you like men or women or both or whatever, that is cool."

"Yeah, I know it's cool," Nev said confidently, "it's the 21st century. If I do date a guy and anyone has a problem then more fool them."

Max smiled, for all his hindering qualities Nev possessed some of the ones needed to make the world better. He was a bit rough around the edges, but kids like him were what the future needed whether society was ready to accept that or not.

In silence they stared out at the city for a while longer until Max suggested they go back inside before Rel came looking for them. He didn't want Nev getting a hard time after being kind enough in sharing this sight with him.

Nev agreed and they went back into the bedroom. He locked the door before placing the key back in the bedside table drawer, but instead of leaving he gave himself the once over in the full length mirror first.

"You look fine," Max chuckled.

Nev smiled then walked up to Max. He took the beer bottle from Max's hand with no explanation and placed it on a dresser with his.

"We probably shouldn't leave that-"

"Hey, Max, can I tell you one more thing before we go back out there."

"Hit me." Max was certain that whatever Nev had to tell him wouldn't top the information he'd just received from the lad in the shock factor.

"Earlier when I said you wasn't my type." Nev's confident smile was replaced by a bashful one. "I kind of lied. You are my type, you've always been my type."

"Oh..." That had definitely topped what he’d learnt prior. Max's natural reaction was to call him an idiot for joking and laugh it off, but when the words fully sunk in he realised that Nev wasn’t joking and he couldn't process a response fast enough. Not before Nev titled his head and kissed him. What was an even bigger shock to Max was that he found himself going through the motions of kissing Nev back before he realised what he was doing, but when it sunk in he couldn’t stop himself and he reacted by pushing Nev back rather forcibly.

He watched in horror as Nev fell into the bed then rebounded onto the ground. At first he thought the fall was worse than it looked, but then Nev clutched his forearm, he probably knocked it on the corner of the bed frame.

"Dude, are you okay?" Max squatted down next to him and reached out to examine his arm. "I'm so sorry I didn't mean-"

"Fuck you." Nev swatted his arm away and then winced in pain. Max deserved that, he felt bad, Nev hadn't deserved that reaction.

"Sorry man, you just took me by surprise."

"I said fuck you." Nev used the bed to aid himself in standing up. "I get it if you don't like me like that and I apologize for jumping the gun, my mistake, but you wouldn't act so disgusted if it was a woman you wasn't into. Well I hope you wouldn't anyway."

"I wouldn't," Max murmured, standing up. Nev was right he wouldn't dare, but he hadn't pushed him away because he was disgusted he really was surprised and not because Nev had kissed him, but because he had realized he wasn't horrified by it. He was actually enjoying it. And that was a part of Max that he ever knew existed, it wasn't even a part of him that before tonight he hadn’t even questioned existed. And that was surprising and overwhelming all at the same time.

Of course Max didn't say all of this to Nev they were both a bit drunk and Nev probably a bit high too. Meaningful deep things sounded good in your head in such situations, but most of the times only translated well into words when sober, Max had learned that the hard way. So instead he simply said, "I think that you're my type too."

It was like those were the words Nev had been longing to hear forever; whatever anger was on his features changed into a massive smile across his face. "You mean it?" He asked, like a kid desperately seeking confirmation.

"Yeah," Max's voice cracked with nervousness. He'd never looked at Nev in any other way than Rel's annoying weird little brother before tonight, but now he was a man. A smart passionate young man with a massive heart, who was kind of goofy in an endearing way and annoyingly cute. These were all qualities that Max looked for in a partner and not to mention there was no denying Nev was good looking even with that stupid grin usually plastered to his face and not to forget them stupidly tight jeans that showed off his stupidly tight ass.

Max felt his face burning up at his admission and thoughts. He quickly turned the attention back to Nev's arm. "Are you sure you're okay?" He asked, examining it tenderly.

Nev gasped slightly as Max's fingers pressed a red area. "It's fine, probably just a bit bruised, but it's fine." "Again, I'm so sorry."

"Ha!" Nev had a sheepish look across his face, "at least this now makes my first kiss with a girl seem 100 times better in comparison."

Max laughed, he remembered the tale of 16 year old Nev accidentally smashing his forehead into the recipient of his first kiss. Then he had an idea, a completely crazy and impulsive one, but he was going to go for it anyway. "It's not too late for a redo you know. So you have at least one good first kiss."

"Think that’s off the cards, she hates me now. Can you believe that?"

"I meant with me, your first kiss with a dude, you idiot. And yeah actually I can believe that."

"Oh..." for once Max had Nev speechless and it was a beautiful thing to witness. Nev just stood there and looked at him hopefully. Max knew he'd have to take the lead.

He approached this like he would a woman, with a stomach full of butterflies, one hand around Nev's waist to pull him closer and another cradled the back of his head. In this instance he wished he was taller than the younger man. He took a deep breath before closing his eyes and kissing him.

For all of Nev's hyper activity he kissed like he had all the time in the world, he kissed Max slowly, like he was fueled by curiosity and not passion. It was sweet, lately when Max kissed someone the only purpose was to lead to other things, he'd forgotten how nice it was to kiss someone just for the sake of kissing them.

It didn't stay that way though, as innocent as they tried to pretend, they were still both young men who reacted the way most young men would in such situations. Nev's hands begun wondering under Max's shirt and he gasped at the cool skin to skin contact, in retaliation Max moved away from Nev's lips which was met with a whine which quickly changed to a low groan when Max nipped at the soft skin of Nev's neck.

And then, as if simultaneously realizing that this whole thing was ludicrous and they could get caught any moment, they both stopped what they were doing.

Max didn't let go of Nev though and Nev's thumbs traced excruciatingly delicate circles into Max's lower back.

"Good redo?" Asked Max breathlessly, a small smile creeping onto his face.

"Decent," Nev winked, "solid seven out of ten."

"Don't pretend that I didn't blow your mind."

"I'd prefer if you blew something else."

Max couldn't help, but laugh at the younger lad's cheekiness.

"Hey, Maxie."

"Yes, Nev."

"I don't suppose you want to hangout this week or something? You can come meet me after work I can get us free pizza."

Nev didn't waste anytime and that reinforced what Max said about him, if he was passionate about something he'd go for. And Max was flattered, he really was, but he knew what he had to do.

"Nev, I'm really busy this week."

"That's okay. How about next week?"

Max winced at how enthusiastic Nev sounded, he hated to be the guy to have to cool things more than he hated being the person in Nev's shoes. "Nev, I'm not here for long, my internship in LA literally starts in 13 days. I'm moving out there indefinitely," he explained, but Nev still looked at him like more of an explanation was needed. "It's probably best that neither of us get too attached like that."

Nev opened his mouth as if he was going to protest then apparently thought against it. He sighed, running his hand through his dark hair and gave a weary smile. "It's cool, I get it."

"I'm sorry."

"No, honestly Max you don't have to apologize for having a life. It's not like we'd seen each other properly in ages, just one stupid drunk kiss I wasn't expecting you to devote your whole life to me."

Max could tell the younger boy was actually trying to convince himself this, but he didn't want to sound patronizing so said nothing else. Instead opting to kiss him again, it was short and sweet like a description of their entire encounter.

"For what it's worth I wasn't lying, you are very much my type and perhaps if I wasn't moving things would be different."

"You know, Max, honestly I've really liked..." Nev didn't get to finish his sentence as the bedroom door flung open, it was Rel, even though they were only talking he and Max instantly jumped as far away from each other as they possibly could.

Rel's eyes slowly went from Nev to Max and he raised an eyebrow. Max suddenly felt very self conscious. He tried to subtly straighten up his shirt and tidy his hair. Nev was just standing there grinning like the cat that got the creme, it wouldn't surprise Max if he wanted to get caught.

"Why are you in my room?" Rel eventually asked.

"Nev was just showing me the view from the balcony." Max piped up before Nev dropped them both in it.

"Yeah, looks like it."

Max could feel his cheeks going red again and he reached for his beer hoping the contents would save him. Nev stepped in to reinforce he was just giving Max the balcony tour and they both apologized before shuffling out the room past Rel.

Nev slyly grabbed Max's hand without his older brother seeing and gave it a squeeze before dropping it and bounding off back to the living area. Rel just stood looking at Max, eyebrow still raised.

"You're a bit red Mr H Maxwell."

"Think I've overdone the beer."

"Was something happening between you and my brother in here? And I don't mean just indulging in my balcony."

"Don't be ridiculous." Max's cheeks were still burning up, but he smiled, Nev had certainly rubbed off on him for tonight at least. "He's so not my type of guy."


	2. TWO

_January 22nd 2010_

_Park City, Utah_

_Sundance Film Festival._

Nev's heart was pounding in his chest, he was so happy he didn't think he'd be able to form words. The audience had loved the movie, they'd actually loved it. The Q&A hadn't gone to plan with some idiots questioning the authenticity of it all, but asides from that it had been great. He had gained a pocket full of business cards from agents, directors and women and men alike who'd just scrawled down their phone number for him.

He knew that this was the start of something big for him. No more making bar mitzvah documentaries when, not if, Catfish was released on the big screen his face was finally going to be put on the industry map. Maybe not as a photographer or a cinematographer as he would've liked, but if success meant broadcasting his embarrassing tale of online love and deceit to the world then he'd just have to own it.

He paced around the green room and kept looking at the clock hoping that Rel and Henry would be back from their interviews soon so they could bask in excitement with him. Feeling peckish, he picked up a banana from a fruit bowl and begun to peel it when there was a knock on the door. He stood up straight and fixed his tie, after all it could be his next employer come to seek him out and offer him a million dollar contract, best be prepared.

He called out to come in and when the person did it definitely wasn't someone coming to offer him work. It was Max Joseph. Nearly completely grey haired Max Joseph with the light brown eyes, cute smile boy next door look.

"Hey, I just saw the guys, they told me to come and wait here with you." And there it was, Max flashed him that killer smile.

"Hey," the word got stuck in Nev's throat and he coughed. "That's fine, go ahead and wait."

A small grin couldn't help but spread on Nev's face, no matter how many years passed Max still made him feel like a love sick teenager, but problem was that he wasn't a teenager anymore. Yeah, they had something really brief at a party before; an experimental kiss or two. Nothing more and nothing less. They were fully cooked adults now, no time for fooling around.

"So you saw the movie?" Nev cringed at his own question, of course he'd seen the movie, they had invited him after all. He quickly added, "What did you think?"

Max furrowed his eyebrows, taking a second to think before replying, "Different, very different. Not what I was expecting at all, but I really enjoyed it."

Nev's small grin turned into a giant one, if he could win over Mr Cynicism himself, the world was his for the taking. An awkward silence fell upon them so Nev busied himself by eating his banana whilst Max opted for playing on his phone. After that kiss Nev had only seen Max a handful of times as the older man now permanently resided in LA and, even then, it was only when Rel or other mutual friends were around. Nev had suggested they meet up alone on various occasions alas Max had refused giving no more than 'that's not a good idea, sorry' as his reasoning.

Now they were here alone and Nev finally had the chance to say all he'd wanted to say yet his mind was blank. It turned out he actually had no idea what he wanted to say.

"You're still an idiot, even if I did enjoy it," Max said eventually, looking up from his phone, "how could you fall so stupidly in love with some woman that you'd never met?"

"She was nice okay."

"There are a lot of nice looking people on the internet, doesn't mean you need to chase them like that. It's stupid."

"Firstly, it's not stupid." Nev was not liking Max's attitude right now. "Secondly, yeah she was hot, but I don't mean nice as in just looks. She was there to talk to, she made me feel special, she made me feel like I was actually worth something for the first time in a long time."

Max's hardened expression didn't change despite Nev's honesty. "Stupidness, just like that stupid buzz cut of yours."

"Hey," Nev ran his hand through his exceptionally short hair, admittedly it wasn't something he'd usually go for, but the girl at hairdressers said it would suit him, which is what he told Max.

"I see, I see." Max rubbed his chin. "Do you just get suckered into any old nonsense a pretty face tells you?"

"Like when one tells you you're his type just to get his rocks off and like an idiot you go along with it. Maybe I am a sucker after all."

Nev didn't know where that had came from, he instantly regretted it. When he finally managed to bring up what happened between them he didn't want it to be in the middle of a heated discussion, but it was too late now.

For the first time during this exchange Max's facial expression changed, he now looked offended. "Nev it wasn't like that." He stuck his phone in his pocket, his full attention was now on Nev. "It was literally just a drunken kiss, it was nothing. I wasn't trying to hurt you or deceive you."

"Maybe it was nothing to you, but it wasn't to me," Nev sighed, his heart felt like it had been crushed into a thousand tiny pieces. "I really fucking liked you for some crazy reason." He crushed his half eaten banana in his hand then threw it in the trash can, wiping the remnants on his shirt getting even more frustrated when he realised he probably had interviews to do in this banana smeared shirt. He knew it would be better for them both if he just asked Max to leave right now, but he didn't, Nev didn't know how to help himself. That was his problem, he always chased things that were no good for him.

"Why don't you like me, Max?" Nev asked.

"Nev, I do like you, just not like that." The way that Max replied, without any hesitation was another blow to Nev. He'd rather be the victim of a whole sequel of Catfish movies than accept the idea that Max would never like him romantically.

"Why not?" Nev knew he sounded like a desperate child, but he didn't care. "We'd be a great couple. We just go together."

"I am flattered you think we go together and I agree, as friends."

Another blow.

"But I don't want to be in a romantic relationship with you Nev, I'm straight, sorry."

"What?" Nev's eyebrows shot up. What sort of nonsense just came out of the grey haired man's mouth. "Did you just say you're straight?"

"Yeah," Max replied confidently. "I like women."

"And men?"

"No, just women."

"Sorry, but did that defect in your hair affect your brain or something? You're not straight Max. You and I had a thing whether you like it or not and I don't know if you've noticed, but like you I am a man."

"Look," Max stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth on his feet, "we had a brief moment, but I was a stupid kid back then. I was curious, drunk and caught up in the moment. I've grown up Nev that phase is over, perhaps you'll grow up one day too."

"Did you really just say that being gay or being bisexual is some immature phase that will pass?" Nev's fists clenched at his side, he bit the inside of his lip and took deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down.

"No, no, that came out wrong, sorry. I mean I realised what I wanted and what was right for me. You'll realise too, whether it be with a man or a woman. You'll eventually stop going after the unobtainable, I mean come on Nev, really? An internet fantasy and your brother's best friend. It was never going to end well."

Max carried on speaking, but Nev took the executive decision to stop listening to what ever the fuck sort of patronising fuckery was coming out of his mouth. He marched up to him, index finger extended, forcibly poking him in the chest.

"It's people like you, Max Joseph, that are the problem. I understand if you don't want to come out to the world, but don't insult me and at least be honest to yourself. All that denial is making you sound like a bigoted dick."

"I am being honest with myself and you. I don't know what-"

Nev had had enough of listening to this bullshit, he pushed Max back hard into the door. Max wasn't given a chance to retaliate as Nev grabbed him by the collar keeping him pinned to the door. "You are a fucking bastard, Max." He shook him as he spoke.

Eventually Max reacted, he tried to get Nev's hands off him to no luck so resorted to pushing him back into the nearest surface. They wrestled and shoved back and forth with neither getting the upper hand for a few minutes. Then, and Nev didn't know who initiated it he was too preoccupied in their wrestling, they were kissing. They slowed down initially, indulging in the moment, but then they quickly started up again trying to get one up on the other. Nev won, he had Max up against the door again, tightly pinning his hands up above his head. He bit Max's lower lip not caring whether he made him gasp in either pleasure or pain. He planted kisses along his jawline then nibbled at his ear. He was about to move to Max's neck when the man finally got his hands free.

Nev played nice and let him have his fun for now. Letting Max have him against the table, the fruit bowl toppled to the ground luckily it didn't smash on the carpet. He sat on the side and wrapped his legs around Max, pulling him close. In an uncharacteristically soft action, Max rubbed his hand tenderly up Nev's thigh.

Max's other hand wound itself up in Nev's tie and he started kissing his neck. Nev wondered if Max had a thing for kissing his neck, was that his signature move, he remembered during their first 'encounter' Max had done the same thing. He wasn't complaining though, even if Max was going at him hard enough to leave a hickey. He was living for this moment, the only thing that could ruin it would be if Max suddenly came out with some more bullshit about denying his sexuality.

Max moved to the other side of Nev's neck, giving it the same treatment. The hand on Nev's thigh still gently moving up and down. If this was any other man apart from Max right now, Nev would already be begging for it or he'd have Max begging for it, he didn't mind either way.

"I'm sorry," Max suddenly whispered into his ear. Then he moved back so he could look him in the eye. "You deserve the world Nev, you deserve happiness and I don't think I can give that to you."

" _You're_ the idiot, Max, if you really believe that."

"It's true."

"Let me guess because I'm a guy and straight as straight Max Joseph couldn't dare be seen as anything but."

Max's expression went blank for a few moments and then he raised his eyebrows. "No, that's not the reason. Because you're a guy who deserves more than what Max Joseph and his dumb bisexual ass can give you."

The moment Max spoke these words, Nev could physically feel the weight that had been lifted from him and surprisingly, right now, he didn't care whether Max liked him like that or not.

"Whether you like guys, or girls, or both it's cool you know." Nev grinned, sort of remembering the words Max had spoken to him when he'd come out to him all those years ago.

Max chuckled, "and if anyone has a problem then more fool them."

Nev smiled at hearing what were once his own words, he liked that Max remembered too. "Is that what you're worried about? What other people may think?"

There was a long pause and Max's eyes darted to the ceiling before landing back on Nev. "When I first moved to LA I got beat up after a couple of colleagues caught me with another man."

Nev's heart sunk and whatever anger he had felt towards Max turned into anger against the world.

"Max, I-I'm so so sorry." His voice was overcome by shock and rage, he didn't have anything to offer the man apart from an apology right now.

"Thanks, but it's not your fault." At first Max sounded like he was about to shrug it off but he carried on, "it was a few months after I moved out there. I did miss you, you know. I was out one night with some friends, met a guy who was into me and we just kissed a few times. That was all. Next day after work I was alone in the parking lot and this guy I recognised as a runner approached me, apparently he'd seen me the night before and didn't take kindly to 'colleagues participating in homosexual activities.' As he put it."

"Max..."

"And then he just attacked me. I fought back at first, but apparently he'd invited a friend along. Luckily someone pulled up and they made a run for it."

"Did they hurt you?" Nev asked and then he almost automatically mentally kicked himself. "Sorry, stupid question really."

Max just gave him a half smile, lifting his hand up to stroke his face. "Black eye, some bruises, superficial scrapes really. It looked worse than what it was. Luckily I was working for a place with a zero tolerance policy against discrimination and they got fired straight away."

"And the police? Did they get arrested."

"I dropped the charges."

"Really? Why would you do that?"

"It was my word against theirs, Nev. CCTV didn't capture anything and like I said I fought back with the first guy and got him pretty bad he could've easily said I started it and his friend jumped in for defense. I just wanted to forget it and move on."

"They deserve to rot in hell. Fucking scumbags I'm so glad that I wasn't there I would've killed them."

Max didn't say anything, he just looked appreciative. Nev suddenly wanted to punch something and at the same time he wanted to cry. He bet this was why Max had tried to convince himself and everyone else he was straight. Six years, six god damn years since this happened, Nev couldn't imagine what it would be like to suppress one's true self for so long, he couldn't imagine what it would be like to face such hatred and discrimination either. He'd had the odd slur thrown at him because of his sexuality, but he could easily shake that off. It was about as hurtful as the boringly idiotic school bullies who had tossed every Jewish based insult they could at him. But to be attacked, have someone thinking it's okay to purposely inflict pain on you for being yourself and not conforming to outdated societal norms when it came to sexuality, Nev couldn't begin to comprehend how Max had dealt with that.

He didn't realise he was crying until Max started wiping tears away with his thumb. He waited the older man to berate him again this time for getting upset, but he never.

"Don't get upset, man. I'm okay and I'm sorry about what I said earlier, you're not an idiot. Well not for falling for people anyway."

Nev laughed and choked from crying at the same time. "I'm working on that okay." He could tell that Max wanted to change the subject now, so he wouldn't push any further. "So how are things with you work wise, Max?"

"Really." Max raised an eyebrow. "You want to talk about work whilst we're in such a compromising position."

He had a point, there was many other things that Nev would rather being doing right now, but he was also genuinely interested in how Max was getting on. Following his adventures on social media were nothing like a first hand account. Although he'd have to ask later, Max was leaning in to kiss him again.

It didn't happen though, voices appeared from outside the door. They looked at each other with wide eyes, both recognising who it was and Max backed up away from Nev as fast as he could whilst Nev done his best to look casual whilst still sitting on the table.

The door flew open and Rel and Henry, both in high spirits bounded in.

"Hey guys," they both greeted barely giving them a second look. Nev and Max didn't move an inch, both hesitant to draw any attention to themselves. When Rel and Henry finished their apparently extremely funny conversation about a lunch buffet they properly paid attention to the other two men. They were being given the same suspicious looks Rel had given them in 2004, after nearly catching them getting down and dirty in his bedroom. Nev could almost laugh and make a joke of it, but he knew that Max wouldn't appreciate that at all.

"You found Nev okay then, Max," Rel stated, staring intensely at Max.

Nev could see Max's ears going red, he could almost feel the awkwardness being emitted by the grey haired man.

"Yes, Nev was just telling me what it was like to be in the film."

Nev was certain he saw Rel and Henry exchange knowing looks. Henry slapped Max on the shoulder and nodded in Nev's direction.

"He's such a hopeless romantic. He just needs someone to love."

Max didn't say anything, his Adam's apple bobbed up and down with the words stuck in his threat. Nev jumped down from the side as he decided it was time to step in before Max combusted.

"Come on guys. Max doesn't want to hear about my failed love life, he just had to sit through a whole movie of it."

"Whatever. And hey at least your short hair means it didn't get as messed up as your shirt and tie when you was wrestling with the fruit bowl."

Now words were getting stuck in Nev's throat. All he could come up with was a, "shut up." As he turned round to pick up said fruit bowl. He threw the bruised fruit in the bin and all that remained for the bowl was some oranges.

Henry said something about going to find out if they had anymore interviews for today or if they could get ready for the after parties. Max jumped at the chance to get out of the room and quickly joined him.

Once the two of them had left, Rel beckoned Nev over and fixed his tie for him. Nev was perfectly able to do it himself, but sometimes it was nice to know Rel still looked out for him like a big brother is supposed to.

"You okay, Nev?"

"Yeah, fine why'd you ask?"

"You look like you've been crying."

"No, no no." Nev protested. "Of course I haven't, I've just been rubbing my eyes a lot, allergies or something maybe." It was a crap lie and from Rel's look he didn't believe him, but he dropped the subject nonetheless and finished with the tie.

"Maybe a change of shirt is in order. I don't believe you managed to stain this one already."

Nev looked down and realised there was a dark patch where he'd rubbed his fruit covered hand earlier. "It was a banana."

Rel laughed, "a 'banana'. Are we in fifth grade?"

It took Nev a moment to realise what joke that Rel was making and he could feel his cheeks getting warm. "Leave off Ariel.

"But you and Max do you have a thing going on, honestly?"

"Max is straight," Nev lied.

"You like him though don't you?" Asked Rel and before Nev could open his mouth to answer his brother spoke again, "there's no point denying it. Ever since you met him at my bar mitzvah you were sort of obsessed with him. Thought it was just some sort of hero worship at first, but it was obviously clearly more than that when you pined over him as a teen."

"I didn't pine," Nev frowned, but he could tell Rel wasn't just trying to tease him, he was doing that other older brother thing of just wanting to talk. "Was it really that obvious?"

"Kind of, well to everyone but Max apparently. _Has_ anything happened between you? Or have you told him at least?"

Nev wanted nothing more than to be able to talk to his brother, he was his best friend after all and there was rarely a time he didn't seek him out for advice, but he could tell him what happened with Max. Not at the moment, not whilst Max wasn't ready to come out to the world.

"I told you Max is straight so nothing and no."

"Well whatever if you say so. Just be careful with him okay, believe it or not I don't want my brother to keep having his heart broken and I know how cold Max can be sometimes."

"It's fine," Nev smiled, he appreciated the concern.

"Plus he's seeing someone you know, a girl he met a few months ago."

That wasn't fine. One step forward with Max and three steps back, just like in 2004. Alas, there was nothing he could do. He couldn't force someone to be in a relationship with him, but it would be nice if Max stopped kissing him.

Rel placed his hand on the back of Nev's head and ruffled his non existent hair in an endearing way. "Shall we go back to the hotel, change your shirt and grab some drinks before meeting them two for the party later?"

"Shouldn't we wait to find out if there's more interviews? I'm sure we have the ones together."

"Nev," Rel squeezed his shoulders. "You're a star now, the interviewers will still be lining up for you tomorrow."

"If you put it like that, why not!"

"Great!" Rel grinned then gave him a backhand slap to the stomach. "Is that really a banana stain, man? I won't tell anyone."

"Rel!" Nev slapped him back on the shoulder, but then laughed. He was lucky to have a brother like Rel, one who'd accept him no questions asked. He hadn't even had to come out to Rel, the older man had once caught him kissing a boy in his kitchen and much to Nev's relief Rel just rolled his eyes and told them they better take out the empty pizza boxes before leaving. And that was that, no questions, no disgust, just acceptance.

Nev couldn't be more grateful and he hoped one day that Max would realise they both shared a great support group, none of whom would judge him.

"Thanks for everything," Nev muttered, unsure if Rel could even hear him.

Rel raised an eyebrow, but gave him a knowing smile. "Come on bro, let's go to the hotel and get them drinks," he said, pushing Nev out of the green room.

The hopeless romantic sighed, he could do with a drink or two.


	3. THREE

_February 14th 2013_

_Pensacola, Florida_

_A hotel._

Max quickly paced up the hotel corridor, looking behind him every other step. He made it to his door, all that was left was the keycard.

Damn, where had he put it?

He frantically patted down the pockets of his gym shorts but only when he put his hand inside did it materialise.

It was too late though.

Nev, who he thought he'd lost when on the way back from their routine daily workout he quickly popped into the production hotel room/make shift office, came jogging down the hall towards him.

"Come on, Maxie, you said you'd hang out this evening."

Max groaned, he didn't understand how Nev was always so full of energy after a long day travelling and a workout on top of that. It was draining to Max just being in his hyper presence.

"Do we have to, man? I just want to chill."

"We can chill, together, in my room."

Max sighed slowly, coming from anyone else that would've sounded extremely suggestive. In fact, coming from Nev it did sound extremely suggestive, especially with that little eyebrow waggle he did, but Max knew better, Nev was a self confessed incorrigible flirt. It was harmless.

"Fine," Max gave in. "Just let me shower and change and I'll be right there."

"That's the spirit!" Nev beamed and he disappeared down the hall into his own room.

It didn't take Max long to shower even though it was usually something he liked to indulge in after a long day and the gym, he knew the sooner he got to Nev's the sooner he could leave. With lack of any real effort he threw on some socks, a pair of grey sweatpants and a blue tee then made his way down the hall, not even bothering with the state of his hair.

It only took one knock before Nev answered so quickly it was if he'd been waiting by the door. "Welcome to my crib!" He announced, stepping aside for Max to enter.

The first thing Max noted was that Nev's room was the mirror image layout of his own, just a bit more messier with the man's stuff dumped everywhere. A big reason why Max was glad they rarely had to bunk together these days. 

The second thing he noted was the smell of hot pizza that surrounded him and his eyes sought out the source. Two medium pizza boxes stacked on the bed along side a few smaller ones and some beer on the bedside table.

"I ordered earlier from Dominos so it would be ready for after the gym. Kind of defeats the purpose, but we can go extra hard tomorrow." Nev said, climbing onto the bed.

The gesture meant that Nev knew without a doubt that Max wouldn't refuse his company this evening. Was he that much of a pushover these days? He wasn't about to complain this time though, the food smelt delicious and made his stomach growl. He sat opposite Nev and studied the labels on the boxes. The usual double pepperoni with potato wedges for Nev and BBQ meat feast with cheesy garlic bread for himself. Nev cracked open the bottles of Budweiser and even though the beer was lukewarm it still hit the right spot.

"Thanks for this, Nev," Max said after devouring his second slice of pizza. And he meant it. This wasn't such a bad idea after all, usually chilling with Nev involved him bouncing off the walls and roping Max in to making themselves a nuisance somewhere, but this was pretty chill.

They discussed the hopeful that they were going to video call for the first time tomorrow and pondered what the situation had in store for them. Something they done all the time, they'd always come up with over elaborate stories even though they hardly ever ended up that way. Not that Max would call any one catfish story mundane, but there was a certain generic pattern that most conformed to.

"We're like the anti cupids and our reward is a series of doomed relationships," Nev said placing his empty pizza and potato wedge boxes on the floor. It always surprised Max how quickly Nev could polish off a large meal and keep so effortlessly slim. It wasn't as if he didn't eat fast too though his own boxes that he added to the pile still had food in. Unfortunately, unlike Nev, effortlessly slim was a myth to him. 

"Are you still hung up on Taylor?" he asked. "It's been almost a month."

"We were together for nearly two years, Max. It's kind of a big deal."

"Yeah I guess it is." Max had to admit, Nev had been devoted to the girl, spending all his spare time video calling, texting, even sending cheesy postcards. They seemed perfect together and it had sucked to see Nev's heartbroken when she split up with him. It sucked almost as much as when he had broken Nev's heart.

"Hey, I saw a video you might like earlier, do you want to check it out?" He asked, changing the subject before things went to a place that they really shouldn't.

"Sure," Nev shrugged. He got up and handed over his laptop and discarded the boxes and beer bottles next to the trash can, making a comedic scene of trying to crush them down with his foot.

Max moved to the other end of the bed and made himself comfortable, leaning back against the pillows he balanced the laptop on his lap and pulled up YouTube. But Nev decided he wanted to go and brush his teeth and freshen up first.

Max checked his phone whilst he waited, but there was nothing interesting and then he begun randomly clicking desktop icons on the laptop. He wasn't in search for anything particular. Interestingly he found a folder labelled '2005-2006'. He was curious as to what Nev had documented from such a year. His eyes darted to the bathroom and he reckoned he had a few minutes before he resurfaced.

He opened the folder and was surprised by what was presented to him. As he expected from the a professional photographer there was dozens of photos, but hardly any were taken by him. Nearly every photo Max had posted on MySpace that pictured himself or photos of Max that had been posted by other people were saved in the folder. This explained how Nev always had an embarrassing photo of him to post Instagram for throwback Thursday.

2005 had been the year just after their first kiss, just after Max had been assaulted at his new job. When Max threw himself deep into work and pushed everything else distracting to the back of his mind, such as Nev. He'd rarely pick up the boy's phone calls before finally changing his number and not telling him, then on the occasions he did email back it was a generic _'hi, hope you're well,'_ situation.

Despite how merry he seemed in these photos, it had been a rough year for Max. His depression and anxiety had hit bad and the only reason he'd been pictured in any of these is because he had made great friends in LA who insisted on putting up with his flake of an ass. He wondered how Nev had coped with that year, he'd heard from Rel that the lad started seeing a councilor and his college exploits were somehow even more wild than high school, but Max never went digging for more information.

It was a year they both skipped over when they reminisced of their experiences whilst apart.

There wasn't just photos in this folder, there were a handful of word documents too. He opened up the one that stood out to him most, it was named _'H'_ , that was his first name after all. He swallowed hard and he checked the bathroom again before he decided it was safe enough to read.

_'It's been nearly a year since I last saw Max. It's been four months since he returned my phone calls. I feel like writing him a letter or something to tell him how I feel, but that's stupid right?_

__

__

_College is hard. Not the workload, I actually enjoy what I study, but the social aspect. Most people just don't seem to get me and you know what, I don't get them either. I do wish Max was here though, he gets me. I miss him so much and I know that just seeing him and being able to talk to him would make everything better. Rel said something about going to visit him soon, maybe I should skip school and tag'_

Max didn't get to finish what he was reading, he heard the bathroom door handle turning and quickly closed all the windows in a panic and slammed the laptop shut.

"You okay there?" Nev asked with a curious eyebrow raised.

"Fine."

Nev seemed to accept that, flashing his clean pearly whites. He climbed back onto the bed and settled down next to Max, in true Nev fashion he left not an inch of space between them.

Max slowly reopened the laptop, paranoid he hadn't closed down the document. His heart skipped a beat when something popped up on screen but it was just a message for a software update. A small sigh of relief escaped his lips and he pulled YouTube back up to find the video he'd promised Nev, a compilation of photographers doing crazy things to get their perfect shot. It was a funny video and Nev seemed to enjoy it, but Max wasn't paying attention. He couldn't help but think about that folder and what he'd read.

He knew how much Nev was into him, that had been obvious, but he never liked to admit it to himself. He knew he'd just feel guilty for kissing him then fucking off to another state and ignoring him, like he was feeling now. They'd only briefly discussed Nev's feelings and what Max had been through and that was way back after the Catfish movie debut at film festival. Of course that had ended in a make out session, but Max was seeing someone at the time and then Nev suddenly entered into a string of relationships so it never seemed like the right time to stir up old feelings. Plus they got on really well now, unspoken boundaries had been set. They were also colleagues now, they had to stay professional.

And Nev knew that, he'd grown up a lot over the years. So then maybe now or sometime soon was actually the right time to finally talk about everything without it getting weird. Max certainly wouldn't be able to leave it alone, not after opening that folder. Nev was a sentimental guy and the fact that he still had all those photos and that document he'd written was a sign that they still meant something to him, that Max still meant something to him.

"These people are crazy!" Nev exclaimed as the video came to an end. "And that's coming from me."

Max chuckled and closed the laptop. He set it down on the bedside table and took a deep breath. Now was a great time to talk to Nev about stuff, they were both relaxed without drinking too much.

"I might go back to my room now, early start."

Okay, that's now what he was meant to say, but that's exactly what came out of his mouth. It was okay though, like clockwork, Nev would protest and he'd feign reluctance and stay, then he could bring it up.

"Oh, okay, fair enough. You're cranky enough anyway waking up after a full eight hours so I'd rather not deprive you of that."

Max smiled, okay, that wasn't meant to happen either.

"Max..."

Bingo! Here it came, Nev was so predictable.

"Happy Valentine's Day."

He choked on air. That's not what he was expecting at all. He stared blankly at Nev who offered no explanation and then it dawned on him that it was in fact Valentine's Day, that would explain all the _'I have the best boyfriend/girlfriend'_ posts on twitter accompanied by snaps of watches, chocolates, flowers etc. Max hadn't thought about it that much, he didn't pay attention to the money grabbing holiday when he was in a relationship let alone single and after a long day travelling.

"I know we're not a couple or anything, don't worry." Nev gave a crooked smile. "But honestly I didn't want to be alone this evening, I'd had plans to fly Taylor out and spend it with her. So thanks for the company."

"Oh," Max smiled back. "Well, her loss, that was some great pizza." A silence fell over them, Max was probably meant to move and get going, but how could he leave Nev after that? If they were going to be angsty about romance it was even more of a reason to bring up everything else anyway.

"I'm sorry, Nev," he said, before he had a chance to talk himself out of it.

"Don't be, it's not your fault. I'll get over it."

"Not Taylor. I'm not talking about that. I'm sorry about me leaving you," Max said, and now it was Nev staring blankly at him. "Back when I moved to LA after that kiss."

"Max, c'mon, that was what? Nine, ten years ago? You had to go and do your thing and I'm over that, we're all good now."

"Yeah I know I had to go, but I should've at least called you."

"You were busy, I get it and that awful thing that happened to you. Look we really don't have to talk about this."

"I want to talk about it, Nev. It needs to be spoken about. Please."

"Okay," Nev sighed, "if you want to."

"Thanks." Max licked his lips, he sure wished he had another beer right now. "I didn't ignore you because I was busy, I ignored you because I wanted to dissociate myself from you and all the feelings attached."

"That's understandable, after what happened with them bastards."

"No, even before that, Nev. I couldn't stop thinking about you after that kiss, but I knew we couldn't be together. We were at different stages of our lives and I was pretty messed up for that first year I was out there. I couldn't even offer myself support let alone you." Max paused, searching for some sort of sign of what Nev was feeling in his facial expressions, but he gave nothing away.

"I didn't need support," said Nev, just because his face didn't give anything away that didn't mean his voice followed suit he sounded defensive.

"How was college for you that year?" Max asked, causing Nev to break his blank face, his eyes widening.

"Crazy, I'm sure Rel's told you. Fights, two car crashes and a motorbike crash, drinking too much, drugs; using and selling. Hey, I stopped stealing though, left that back in high school. I'm surprised I didn't get kicked out until the year after."

Max tried to hide his shock. Nev was wrong, Rel hadn't told him the extent of Nev's turbulent time. He didn't know about the car totalling or the dealing drugs. It really had been bad and maybe just a phone call or a visit could've helped him. 

"And it was so fucking lonely. I was the rich spoiled douche bag and I can't blame the other kids for thinking that because I certainly lived up to that fucking label. And to top it off, I thought you hated me..." Nev trailed off and just shrugged. "I dunno, man, maybe we needed each other just to make it a little easier."

"Yeah," Max said wistfully, "maybe we did."

"But look," Nev said with a smile, "look at us now, I've got your back and you've got mine." Max nodded in agreement.

"Why'd you want to talk about this tonight anyway?" Nev then asked.

Max hesitated, he didn't want to lie to Nev, but he also didn't want to embarrass him with mentioning what he saw on the laptop. "It just felt like it was time."

Not a complete lie. Neither of them said anything. They just stared at one another, waiting for the other to make the next move.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Schulman." Max eventually said, he didn't know why he had said that, if it was something to fill the silence he was looking for there was plenty of other things he could've said. He told himself to get off the bed and say his good nights next leave things on a decent note, but his body had other ideas. Instead of retreating he done completely the opposite shifting his body and leaning into Nev. He ran a hand through Nev's hair and then cupped his cheek, closing what ever little space they had left between them, their foreheads pressed together. In a sweet gesture he rubbed his nose against Nev's. Nev gulped hard, and Max licked his lips but instead of kissing him he tenderly trailed his fingers across his jaw and down his neck. He followed with his lips leaving the faintest of closed mouths kisses in his path. 

Nev sighed and it was like music to Max's ears, he could feel the younger man's chest rapidly moving as his breathing sped up, Max placed his other hand over it, feeling his heart pounding. It echoed his own. He traced his thumb around Nev's lips and then finally closed his own eyes and slowly leaned forward to kiss him.

It seemed like the right thing to do, plus he wanted to. As much as he pushed Nev away, whether jokingly or out of annoyance and frustration, he would honestly be lost without him. He secretly wanted Nev to intrude on his personal time and invite him over to chill and eat pizza and he wanted Nev to know that he'd always be there for him. That's what this kiss would be for to let him know the things he couldn't put into words.

Max didn't get a chance to convey that though, with a kiss or even words. Nev shifted backwards and put his hands on Max's chest. 

"What's wrong?" Max asked, opening his eyes, Nev looked uncharacteristically vulnerable and unsure of things.

"I don't want your pity kiss, Max."

"It's not a pity kiss," Max scrunched his face up, had Nev not listened to him just saying that he was all he could think of after their first kiss. Surely that explained how Max felt.

"I don't know why this sudden urge to talk about the past and apologise, I really am grateful, don't get me wrong. But that's all I can offer you to make you feel less guilty, I want to kiss you, but not under these circumstances."

"It's not at all like that."

"So you want to start dating? This kiss will mean something?"

"Can't we just have one uncomplicated moment and enjoy it?"

"I'm sorry, Max. I'm sorry if you feel guilty, but I can't do this."

Max frowned, he got the message loud and clear. He never imagine that Nev would be the one refusing him. He'd be lying if he said he didn't feel guilty because he did, but that wasn't the sole reason of wanting to kiss him. Nev was right though, it wasn't fair on him to just use this as way to make himself feel better.

Max got up and looked sheepishly down at his feet. "Can we just forget that just happened."

"Of course. Night, Max."

"G'night." Max shuffled out the room as quickly as possible. He got back to his hotel room and sat on the side of his bed holding his head in his hands.

He'd screwed that one up royally.

He then jumped and paced around. Defiantly kicking what ever got in his way, suitcase, chair, sneakers. He just had to go prying on that stupid laptop hadn't he. Why couldn't he ever just leave things alone? Why couldn't he leave Nev alone? 

He just couldn't. That was the only lame explanation his dumb brain would offer him. 

Acting on impulse he left his room and marched up the hall back to Nev's. Ignoring the young couple he passed who muttered something about whether he was the 'catfish dude.' He pounded on Nev's door and eventually he answered.

Nev rolled his eyes. "Look, Max, I really don't think..."

Max had no time to listen. They'd spoken enough already, he stepped into the room and kicked the door closed behind him then took Nev's face in his hands and kissed him without giving him a chance to protest. This approach worked more than the last, Nev relaxed his body and slid his arms around Max's waist. 

"It's not a guilt kiss, you idiot." Max insisted when they broke apart. "I'm kissing you because I want to, yeah that maybe selfish, but I really fucking want to. And I know you want to too, so let me give you this. I'm not going to lead you on and promise you a relationship and if you don't want to that's fine. But this is nice and I think we both deserve this. Right now it's all I have to offer you."

It was nice, it was more than nice. He'd enjoyed his previous breif make out sessions with Nev, he was a good kisser and he always experienced some teenage like innocence when they kissed. Like every time was their first time and that excited him.

"So this is just a kiss, nothing more?" Nev asked. "Because there's some stuff you can't come back from."

Max's eyebrows raised. He hasn't actually thought about anything else, yes he had got turned on the other times, but that was a natural reaction to be expected. He wasn't in this for the sex. Max hadn't even had sex with another man before.

"It's just you and me, enjoying this moment."

"I can go with that." Nev gave him a chaste kiss. "Stay with me tonight, Max. I don't want to be alone, just tonight."

"Nor do I."

Nev didn't try and hide the massive smile which broke out on his face. He took Max's hand and led him to the bed. This was a crazy albeit perfect idea. Max slipped under the covers whilst Nev set the alarms on his phone before doing the same. Max thought there would be initial awkwardness, but Nev didn't let that happen. He balanced himself over Max and took the opportunity to kiss him again.

It was soft and slow like they wanted it to last for ever, but it couldn't. Eventually Nev settled down and buried his head in the crook of Max's neck and hooked his legs over Max's. It was an annoying position for Max, but for a one off he would deal with it.

"Sweet dreams, Maxie." Nev whispered.

"Mmm, you too," Max said, pressing a few kisses into Nev's hair and with that both of them soon descended into sleep.

Max awoke two times before he had to. First time was the middle of the night when Nev got up to pee. The realization hit his half asleep self that he was sharing a bed with Nev and shockingly not just because he was forced to, but nevertheless, when Nev returned from the bathroom and he apologized for waking Max, Max contently let him take up the position of 'big spoon'.

The second time was early morning, before Nev's alarms went off, but Nev was still awake. Max pretended to be asleep for a few minutes so he could wake his brain up properly before emerging from under the covers. Nev was sitting cross legged in a chair across the room looking at his phone and drinking what smelt like coffee.

He smiled when he saw Max wake up, "Good morning sunshine."

"G'morning, what time is it?"

"Only 6," Nev replied then he chuckled at Max's groan. "Go back to sleep, I'll wake you when you have to be up."

"Why are you over there?" Max asked, he knew Nev usually woke up stupidly early, but he could easily check his phone and drink his coffee from in bed.

"Woke up, couldn't get back to sleep." Nev shrugged. "And I couldn't trust myself not to watch you sleep. Feels a bit too intimate you know."

"Oh, okay," Max mumbled, he didn't quite understand Nev's logic, but it was way too early to think about it. "I'm gonna go back to sleep for a bit, I don't mind if you want to come back to bed."

"I might after I've drunk this."

"Good," said Max, pulling the covers over his head, unsure whether Nev could even hear him. "Because I liked it."


	4. FOUR

_May 11th 2014_

_Manhattan, New York City_

_MTV Offices._

It had driven Nev more than a bit wild when Max had said he looked particularly dapper this evening and squeezed his thigh for good measure. That was pretty much why he currently had his tongue down the older man's throat.

"We're going to get caught," gasped Max as he gave a feeble attempt to push Nev off him, but Nev was taller and stronger and had the upper hand.

"Your beard tickles you know," Nev said, choosing to ignore him, but Max pouted and stroked his chin thoughtfully.

"Don't you like the beard?"

"Love it." He really did, it made Max look rugged, he liked a rugged Max.

Nev kissed him again, he groaned at the feeling of Max running his hand down his back. He'd missed the feeling of pleasure that came with kissing Max, it had been too long, over a year. But over that year they'd been in a good place; two friends on the road with a mutual understanding they were both into each other. Lingering touches, lingering glances, lingering feelings. 

Nev had been happy going at this extremely slow and 'hands off' pace, but he was even happier at the idea that soon more progression might actually be made. An actual date perhaps.

"Come on," Max said, Nev was so caught up in his own thoughts he'd let Max slip away from between him and the wall. 

"We have ages, it's all about being fashionably late."

"Not to our own party." 

Nev found himself being dragged down the hall by the stubborn grey haired man. Nev wasn't going that easy though, stopping to kiss him with every few steps. He was only given a few seconds though before being moved along. They made it to the elevators and stood waiting patiently, exchanging a mixture of dangerous glances and goofy grins with each other. 

The moment the elevator reached their floor Max dropped Nev's hand and just as well, there was a man already inside. Max pressed the button to go down to the third floor, but Nev leaned over and hit the one for the fourth floor. Max looked confused; Nev offered no explanation.

As the elevator went down the random man struck up a conversation with Max, who apparently knew him over a debacle with the fifth floor coffee machine, and then went on to congratulate them both on the renewal of Catfish so they thanked him.

When the elevator hit the forth floor, Nev didn't waste a second in pushing Max out barely giving him a chance to his acquaintance before he could question anything.

"Dude, what are you doing?"

"This." Nev weaved through the dimly lit, open plan office and found the desk he was looking for. Kelly wouldn't mind him using her fancy new Apple speaker dock. "I know you won't dance with me at the party so how about now, may I have this dance?" Nev pulled up Spotify on his phone and found the song he wanted before plugging it in to the speakers.

"You're crazy."

"Please, Max, just one dance to celebrate."

Max stuffed his hands in his pockets and rolled back and forth on his heels before sighing. "Fine," he said defeatedly, "one quick dance and I'm keeping an eye on that elevator display, if I see it moving near this floor dance time is over."

Nev pressed play on his phone and held out his hand to Max. Max shuffled over awkwardly. "Don't worry, we'll take it slow," Nev said, reassuringly.

"Chasing cars?" Max chuckled as Nev pulled him close. "This is very romantic."

"I'm a very romantic guy, Max, one day you'll really find out." Nev flashed his trademark smile. 

Max just rolled his eyes and shook his head. They started moving slowly back and forward to the music, their hands around one another's waist. He could tell Max was nervous as he was looking everywhere apart from at Nev and true to his word he kept glancing over at the elevator.

Nev subtly moved them round so Max couldn't check the elevator with out turning his entire body. Then he started humming and mouthing along to the words getting Max to finally look at him. Max finally broke his resolve with smiles and laughter and Nev kissed him on the forehead. They were both getting into it and Nev was disappointed when the song came to an end.

"Happy now?" Max asked.

"Yup! It was a very nice dance. Thank you, H Maxwell."

"You're welcome, Yaniv."

Max was still holding him, Nev was surprised he hadn't let go or tried to check the elevator. 

"This song, it makes me think of you, that's why I chose it."

"You want us to waste time chasing cars around our heads?"

"Max!" Nev chided, knowing the older man was teasing. "I want you in my life forever, Max."

"Well I'm certain that MTV will be keeping us together for quite a while longer.

Nev groaned, Max was clearly purposely avoiding the point he was trying to make. Not even he was this dense. "I want the moments we have to last forever. I want to grow old with you."

"Why does it sound like you're about to propose?"

"I like where we are now and I don't want to rush things, but I'd really like to know whether you see a future for us. We've been dancing around this thing for years. If you're still not ready to come out, that's fine, but you should know by now if you have any intention of being with me in be long run."

Max dropped his hold on Nev and perched himself against one of the desks, his demeanour didn't give Nev much confidence in what was going to come next.

"Nev, I wasn’t going to wait until after the party but I have to be honest with you."

"Go on." Nev swallowed hard, he braced himself for whatever Max's thoughts on the future were.

"I'm leaving."

"You're what?" His heart instantly sunk, he hadn't braced himself for that because that what an option that had never crossed his mind.

"Only for a bit, I've been asked to direct a movie."

Nev mentally high fived himself, of course Max wasn’t leaving long term. "Like a whole actual movie?"

"A whole movie, Nev. They're in talks to get Zac Efron on board to star in it, it's about edm and DJs."

"You sure kept that quiet."

"Sorry, I didn't want to jinx anything until it was set in stone. That's why I've been busy during this break, working on the script."

"Max, I'm so happy for you. Tonight is like a double celebration then, Catfish season renewal and Max Joseph's directorial debut."

"Thanks, its crazy just thinking about it."

"You deserve it. It was only a matter of time before people took note of your epic skills." Nev smiled. Max's biggest critic had always been himself, even when he done something amazing he managed to find non existent faults. So Nev always took it upon himself to offer him more reassuring praise than he'd usually offer someone else.

"Thank you. Principle photography starts in August and of course I'm going to be super busy in the run up, so I won't be around for filming the new season for a while."

"That's okay," Nev forced a chuckle supporting his friend way outweighed his own selfish desires right now, "as long as you don't forget about us once you're a big Hollywood director."

"Ha! I don't know about that, don't think I'll be at the Oscars anytime soon." Max stroked his beard. "But I'll definitely be back."

"So do you think-"

"Also, I need to tell you something else." Max crossed his arms and softened his voice the way he usually did when he was preparing Nev for a blow. "Filming is mostly taking place in California. My ex and I have been talking recently, she wants to try and work things out and so do I. So we're going to see how it goes whilst I'm out there."

"Well that's just great." Nev didn't even try to hide his disappointment. Neither of them had exactly abstained this past year but he knew the ex that Max was on about, the only ex Max had in California. And it wasn't just an ex girlfriend, it was his ex fiancée. If it worked out between them then there was definitely no hope of any form of relationship that was professional or platonic between him and Max.

To be fair, Nev couldn't act surprised. The one thing Max had been completely clear about since the beginning of this weird low-key thing that they had going on was that pursing a romantic relationship together wasn't something that was going to happen. At least he was consistent, Nev didn't really know why he expected now to be any different.

This 'always the optimist' thing really hadn't got him far when it came to affairs of the heart.

"I don't want you to hate me, Nev. I didn't come to this decision easily, I've considered us and really I think it's for the best. In the long run we should find other people, we're not getting any younger."

Nev didn't have the energy to argue with Max, he knew all too well how stubborn the man was. He found it funny thought when he mentioned that he'd 'considered' them, because Nev really wasn't feeling all too 'considered' right now.

"It's fine I guess," Nev lied, "I appreciate you being honest with me and I don't hate you Max, it's clear that in fact that it's quite the opposite."

Despite all they had been through, this was as close to a confession of being in love that Nev had ever come to telling Max. Like the song said, those three words never did quite seem enough, not for a man like him.

"This won't be like before like when I moved to LA. I'll always be just a phone call, text, snapchat, video call, tweet, email, what ever you want away. And I'm promising you I'll be back this time."

_"Yeah back with a fucking wife,"_ Nev said in his head. To Max he just raised his eyebrows and nodded, mumbling a thanks. Maybe, just maybe, it was time he started thinking about himself and making his own plans for the future sans Max Joseph.


	5. FIVE

_November 19th 2016_

_Venice, Los Angeles_

_Photography studio._

They weren't dating. That's what Nev had replied when the interviewer had asked him last week. They spent most of their time together, went bowling, to dinner, shopping, to the movies and they supported each other like a couple.

But they definitely weren't boyfriend and boyfriend.

He also missed out the part that they'd kissed on four different occasions, not that Max was keeping count, and he had continuously reinforced that they were straight, well that Max was straight anyway. Nev was confident enough to let them make up their own minds when questioned about his sexuality.

They might as well be a couple, most of their fans seemed to accept they were anyway. What had scared Max at first was that he didn't want to face discrimination like he once had plus once upon a time he'd struggled with his sexuality, but he'd now came to terms with it and he was realising the world was each day growing into a more and more accepting place. In fact, if it was any man except Ariel Schulman's annoying little brother, Max was sure he would've already dived right in.

Something about it being Nev was holding him back, he really wished it wasn't, but it was. If they were together as a couple it would make things so much easier. He'd be able to kiss him when he wanted, hold his hand walking down the street, compliment him without adding 'bro' at the end just to reinforce how platonic it was. He would be happy and Nev would be happy, that's what he wanted more than anything for the both of them.

Max sighed as he walked into the studio Nev had hired out for the morning. Nev had asked Max to take some photos of him for some reason or another. Just additional time they'd be spending together alone in an intimate setting whilst not being a couple. The budding model was already waiting for him when he arrived. He'd bought his own camera gear and set it up along with the lights, a green backdrop and everything else that he needed. At least that was work that Max didn't have to do.

"Morning," he said, dumping his backpack and shrugging off his hoodie in the corner on the room.

"Good morning, Max. Sorry for dragging you out so early."

"It's fine," Max lied, if it was for anyone else but Nev there was no way he'd be out at 9:30am on a day off. The fact Nev handed him a coffee from his favourite coffee place made it slightly more bearable too. It wasn't hot anymore, but it was better than nothing.

Nev explained something about wanting to update his portfolio. Max didn't bother questioning him why, knowing the younger man it was probably some ludicrous plan to become some fashion week's next biggest thing. Though, Max did ask why he was the one asked to take photos.

Max knew his way around a DSLR, but Nev was the expert photographer who had a network of equally as good photographer friends, and, if all of them were indisposed it wasn't exactly like Nev was short of a dollar to hire a professional.

"Because you know I like you, Max," came Nev's simple answer. 

What the hell was that supposed to mean? Was Nev intentionally trying to screw with his head, especially with that stupid yet adorable smile. Max took a deep breath, all he had to do was get this over and done with then he could go home, take a much needed cold shower, order pizza and sleep.

Things started off relatively mundane. For one reason or another Nev hadn't brought a change of outfit so they just kept going taking photo after photo. The fitted white t-shirt, black skinny jeans and crisp white Nike Air Force sneakers was a fresh look that he wore well, extremely well, but there was only so many ways he could work it. Eventually, Nev apparently became aware of this too. He bounced up behind Max and asked to see some of the photos.

"These are great," said Nev, he squeezed Max's shoulder and left his hand there lingering afterwards. He continued talking, but Max wasn't listening; all he could focus on the rise and fall of Nev's chest against his back, the thumb rubbing small circles onto his shoulder, the feel of his breath against his cheek.

"You should let me take photos you one day, Max."

That quickly brought Max back to reality. 

"Why?" He asked, subconsciously taking a step away from Nev. "Why would you want to do that?"

"I think you look nice, I'd love to shoot you."

There was that smile again. That beautiful contagious smile that was one of Nev's good qualities.

He had many good qualities and not just physical. His mere presence could light up an entire room, he always tried to see the best in people, but he was no pushover. Just a bit naïve with a childlike innocence which Max found himself subconsciously trying to protect.

He brought out the best in Max, his anxiety and depression had rarely reared its ugly head over the years he'd spent on the road with Nev and on the occasions it dared try, the younger man was always there to help him through it. He pushed Max past his boundaries, in a good way; he'd experienced so much and learnt so much and done things he would never have imagined he was capable of because of Nev.

He made Max feel loved, he made Max want to give him the same feeling.

Was this what had him so whipped over his cohost. Love? Or was it just infatuation? Like they were just two young men fumbling around in Nev's older brother's bedroom again. Not really certain what they're doing or where they were going to go from there.

Max wasn't sure what it was or whether Nev would reciprocate it after years of keeping him at arms length. It was his own fault really. Just the other year Max had even got re-engaged to his ex just to self sabotage any sort of romantic future with Nev, and when that all went to shit. Who was still there to support him? Nev was, he really didn't deserve such a person in his life. 

Whatever it was he was feeling though, Max finally realised what was holding him back. It might not be the perfect fairytale ending he wanted right now, but it was still god damn amazing to just be able to still be part of Nev's life, after everything Max had put him through. And he didn't want to run the risk of losing that if things did escalate and all went wrong. 

Nev had even said himself once that there was just some things you couldn't come back from.

Nev was staring at him hopefully like something was meant to happen, like they were meant to kiss again. How could he think the feelings wouldn't be reciprocated, of course they would. Nev literally just told him that he still liked him and after years of him trying to convince Nev it wasn't going to happen he'd never given up. Max was still scared though, they were both vulnerable in their own ways. What if he couldn't give Nev as much love as he wanted or needed and what if Nev gave Max too much and he became overwhelmed. Not to mention a relationship wasn't the only thing riding on this, a hit tv show was too. They had their careers to think about.

It seemed Nev realised nothing spontaneous was about to happen, but nonetheless that didn't shake his happy attitude as he retook his position in front of the camera. "Time for the money shots, baby!" He exclaimed then shed his shirt without hesitation.

Max swallowed hard, he definitely hadn't been expecting that. Not that he was complaining, Nev's great physical qualities extended way past just a winning smile and good haircut. The once skinny man had been working hard on his physique for the past year or so, more than just their daily hotel gym routine which was evident in the fact that whilst Max managed to keep the fat off and had a relatively 'normal' body for a man of his age, Nev on the other hand had the sort of body that a man would want to show off. Just visible under the vast amount of black hair on his torso were defined abs that Max could only dream of having, he liked food too much. And not to mention Nev's biceps, Max was certain he was wearing more short sleeve tees and finding any chance to flex and show them off, then there was his back muscles. When he moved Max found himself mesmerised by the muscles moving under his taut skin.

Nev always looked good for the camera. Whether it was posed or he was caught completely off guard in the middle of eating the messiest sloppy joe, he somehow made it work. It was different now though, with Nev shirtless. He was still taking a good photo, but it seemed forced and unrelaxed like he was suddenly self conscious. Max was surprised, Nev made no secret of the fact he preferred not to wear a shirt whenever and wherever possible, but then again it wasn't everyday you got photographed half naked by your best friend slash almost lover.

Max took a deep breath and went up to him. 

"Relax, Nev," Max said with a smile, grabbing Nev's shoulders and squeezing them. "Like you was before."

"Sorry," Nev murmured. "Relaxed. I've got this." he stretched out then Max had an idea. He plugged his iPod, something that Nev always teased him about still using, into the speakers that Nev had brought with him but had yet to use.

Music always managed to make situations easier especially when it came to Nev, once professional dancer Nev. Max played a playlist of edm to keep it upbeat and turned it up loud.

When he got back behind the camera the difference in Nev was reflected in the photos. In between shots he'd joke about and dance to the music, Max still snapped away. He liked a candid. Then Nev went for the vanity shots, he put on a serious face and started flexing for the camera.

He titled his head in exactly the right position so the light hit him perfectly and tensed in a way to show off his muscles without looking like he was blatantly posing. He knew how to work the camera.

He knew how to work Max.

Max was having a hard time keeping his attention focused on the camera's little screen instead of the model. All he could think about was waking up every morning with those strong arms around him. He wanted to trail his fingers delicately over Nev's v-lines and make the younger man shudder. His hands feeling them beautiful back muscles, fingernails digging in leaving marks like Nev was his property to do so as they fucked.

As cheesy as it sounded in his head, he wanted Nev to make love to him the same way as he did to the camera.

"Okay, how do they look Max?"

"Great." Max went red before he even said his next line. "You look great, you look perfect absolutely fucking perfect."

Nev was taken aback my Max's words. He just stood there and blinked. His mouth slightly agape, his perfect kissable mouth.

Max set the camera carefully on the tripod and beckoned Nev closer to him. Right now, Max didn't want to think of anything but the here and the now with the man standing in front of him. He pushed all feelings of doubt and worry to the back of his mind, like Nev always told him; don't focus on what may or may not happen just live for the moment.

So that's exactly what he did. He yanked Nev close and kissed him.

Nev didn't protest, of course.

It suddenly dawned on Max that kissing Nev was something that he wasn't willing to live without.

"What was that for?" Nev asked, smiling, his forehead pressed against Max's.

"Because I really fucking wanted to and you look really fucking hot right now."

Nev looked ridiculously pleased that he finally had Max admitting he was feeling this kind of way, but he didn't comment on it or tease him. He went to open his mouth to speak though, but Max didn't let him, kissing him again. They ended up on the floor, Nev kneeling between Max's legs. He pulled Max's t-shirt over his head, he spread it behind him then laid him back. He liked the way Nev looked at him, like was the only person in the world that mattered. It was the way Nev had always looked at him, but being foolish he'd chosen to ignore it. He undone his belt, there was no point denying what was about to happen and how much he wanted it. He felt instant relief when he undone his jeans zipper as his growing erection had been confined by the material.

Nev watched him with a bemused look set across his face, then he pried Max's hands away from his jeans and pinned them on the floor either side of his head. He kissed Max's mouth, cheek, neck, anything he could reach whilst keeping his hands pinned.

After failing to get free from the stronger man's grip Max hooked his leg over Nev's waist and pulled him down flush against him.

It was a strange feeling. Having Nev Schulman laying on top of him, touching him, turning him on. A strange albeit welcoming feeling. Nev finally freed Max's hands and he took the opportunity to run them over Nev's back, memorising the feel of the muscles he liked the look of so much.

Suddenly, Nev sat back on his knees. He looked down at Max and smiled.

"What's that look for?" Max asked.

"I've waited so long for this, Max, you wouldn't believe."

"Try me."

"I've wanted you since the moment I laid eyes on you."

Max laughed, "that's so cheesy. Classic Nev Schulman."

"I'm being serious, Max. Nothing's changed sjust like before I need to know if you like me too and this isn't just some one time thing."

"It can be two or three times if it makes you feel better."

"Max! You can't keep doing this to me because no matter how much I try to resist we always seem to end up in this position." Nev frowned. "I don't want to get hurt again."

"It's different this time, I promise." Max bit his lip. "I really like you, Nev, and I would like to be with you in the long run." It actually felt good to say out loud.

 _"I might even love you,"_ he added in his head.

"Have you ever been with a man, Max?"

Max was not expecting that question, and the words got stuck in his throat as he replied, "not intimately, no."

"It's quite different from being with a woman, you know."

"Well, I figured." Max was fed up of all this small talk he sat up so he could kiss Nev and it worked in shutting him up for all of ten seconds.

"I can't do this now, I'm sorry, Max."

"What!?" That came out sounding a bit more abrupt than Max wanted, he took a deep breath and tried to smile softly. "As in now being here on a cold studio floor? Your place is only a few streets away right?" He kissed Nev's neck and was sure he had him for a moment, alas it turned out to be a futile effort.

Nev shuffled back so Max had no choice but to stop. He was serious and Max was frustrated, short of begging he had no choice, but to hear him out.

"Don't you want this?"

"Obviously," Nev replied as if it was a stupid question. "I just want to do this right. This is going to be our first time together, I've waited so long that I'm willing to wait a while longer. I want to at least go on a date first and make sure that you're ready, that _we're_ ready and making decisions we won't regret." 

"It's 2016 Nev. Plus I'm pretty sure all the times we've gone out have to count as dates, let's be honest."

"I want a proper date, Max. Butterflies when I pick you up, holding hands, giving you my jacket when you're cold. The whole shebang."

Max sort of wanted to question why Nev had suddenly taken a dominate position in this fantasy future relationship of theirs, but instead he just sighed and nodded.

"I'm sorry."

As frustrated as he was, Max couldn't make Nev feel bad for not putting out. He wasn't that sort of guy. Plus he'd known that for a long time that Nev was becoming less and less interested in casual sex as he matured and he wanted something meaningful. So if that's what he wanted, then that's what Max was going to give him.

"It's fine, Nev, if you want to wait then I'm happy waiting." Max smiled, a sincere smile and in turn Nev smiled. Nev was too cute.

"Great, so are you free on Wednesday evening?"

They would both be back in New York, independently, for work related things, but asides from that and seeing friends and family, Max had no solid plans for the week. "Yeah, as far as I know."

"Awesome. It's a date, I'll text you details later."

Nev kissed Max on the forehead and then jumped up. He retrieved his t-shirt and started gathering his things together, as if nothing had happened between them just now.

Max sat there and watched, wishing he could be so nonchalant, but all he could think of was getting home and relieving this built up 'pressure'. 

A cold shower was in need along with coming to terms with just what he'd gotten himself into.


	6. SIX Part A

_November 23rd 2016_

_Brooklyn Heights, New York City_

_The Joseph residence._

The initial first date nerves didn't hit Nev until the moment he was on the doorstep of Max's parent's house. A house he'd visited many times, but never for such a situation. He knew Max's parents were away on vacation, but he still imagined them opening the door and grilling him about his intent with their son. Even if that did happen though, Nev would reply that his intentions were good; he would always treat Max with utmost respect and planned to make an honest man out of him, eventually.

His leather gloved hands pressed the doorbell and Max quickly answered. They looked each other up and down, Max looked cute in a white cable knit sweater and blue stonewash jeans. Whilst Nev had gone for the complete opposite look, plain black jumper, black leather jacket, black skinny jeans, black boots. His scarf and beanie were navy blue though, offering some tiny degree of contrast.

"You look nice," they said almost in unison.

"Thanks," they did it again and both smiled sheepishly.

"These are for you," Nev said, presenting Max with the bunch of flowers in his hand. 

"Thanks." Max took the bunch and beckoned Nev inside. "Very colourful selection."

"One color is so mundane," Nev said. When in fact the reason there was roses of all different colors was because he didn't want to make things awkward with just one and what it supposedly meant. The guy in the flower shop had thought he was adorably cute for doing so.

"Can I get you a drink?" Max asked. "We've got beer, wine, a few spirits."

"I'm okay for now thanks, I'm driving."

"Oh yeah." 

Nev followed Max into the kitchen and watched as the man rummaged around several cupboards until he found what he was looking for - a plastic measuring jug. He filled it up with water and placed the roses in it, leaning them against the wall for balance.

That was a 'special' way of doing things, Nev thought, but Max looked proud of himself. Knowing Max's mom, if the flowers survived by the time she returned, they definitely would not stay there in that jug for long.

"So where are we going?"

"I can't tell you that, first dates are meant to be a surprise."

"Can you at least tell me whereabouts, like are we staying in Brooklyn?"

"Manhattan."

"Dude, did you drive all the way here just to take me back to Manhattan? You know I would've been happy taking the subway."

"Yeah I know," Nev shrugged, "but I wanted to pick you up."

Max gave him a thankful smile and then excused himself to finish getting ready. Nev had a feeling that meant applying gel to his flat hair which was a shame because it always looked fluffy and cute with no product.

Nev wandered into the living area, curious as to whether Max's impressive record collection was still lining one of the walls, which it was. But even more interesting was that by the looks of things the Joseph's were having a clear out. There was multiple cardboard boxes and trunks piled up in the centre of the room. Nev peaked into the cardboard box closest to him, it contained an impressive Marvel comic book collection, then he read on the side of the box what was written, 'Max's comics #1.'

Below it was two boxes labelled, 'Max's books fiction' and 'Max's books non fiction'. Stepping back, Nev realised every box that had been labelled seemingly contained Max's belongings. Maybe he was planning on taking some stuff back to LA with him. Nev was drawn to one in particular it was a battered red trunk in the corner of the room, a small white label stuck to it that read 'memories to keep'. The outside was decorated with various fading super hero stickers.

He didn't hesitate in opening it, curiosity always got the better of him. Inside was what one would expect from a box called 'memories to keep'. There was a few toys and trinkets, an ancient looking video camera, a baseball, a well read copy of 'Rebel Without a Crew' by Robert Rodriguez. Nev picked up the high school yearbook and eagerly flicked through it trying to find Max, his attentions were turned though when a bunch of old photographs fell out. These looked cooler to look at, he already knew what Max looked like at high school. The majority were photos of him as a young black haired, bright eyed boy grinning at the camera. An obligatory first day of school photo in his adorable private school uniform that was clearly bought with the intention of him growing into it to get a few years wear. 

There was one from his bar mitzvah with Rel and a few other friends and a little Nev standing on a chair making the peace sign behind Rel's head. Nev smiled at the fond memory. He could remember it so well, every moment with Max was unforgettable. After looking at the photos Nev was going to put everything back, but realised there was some stuff he'd initially missed. There was a bunch of old drawings of animals, houses, family members and superheroes signed by 'Max Joseph' age ranging between 4 and 9. Then there was a winning certificate for a high school short film competition, his high school diploma, bachelor of the arts certificate and at the bottom of all this old school stuff was a crumpled question and answer sheet Max had once filled in.

The first few questions were 'what's your name?', 'how old are you?', 'what grade are you in?' etc etc. Max had been 14 when he'd written this. And then it asked what he wanted from the future. Interestingly Max had written that he wasn't entirely sure, maybe either a director or a writer of some kind; he'd be happy writing screenplays or fiction novels. Nev was happy that young Max got to tick both director and writer off his list with 'We Are Your Friends.' 

Max's answer continued with most of all he wanted to be happy, because being sad sucked. He wanted to find someone or something that made him happy and keep it with him forever; a thing or a person that would make him smile everyday. This was kind of deep for a fourteen year old boy.

"Having fun there?"

Nev jumped and threw the paper back in the box. "S-sorry. I was just..."

"It's fine, it's fine. Mom and dad want to convert the basement and this won't all fit in my room here. So I'm going to try and take it back to LA." Max squatted down next to Nev and pulled out the paper he'd been reading. "I like this because it reminds me that dreams do sometimes come true if you work hard enough."

"Yeah they do." Nev smiled proudly, they had both come from extremely privileged backgrounds and their parent's had given them the best start possible, but still Max had always worked extremely hard to get to where he was in the industry. He dedicated himself to every project and put in maximum effort; sleepless nights, early mornings and worry even where not needed. Whereas things had sort of come easy to Nev and fallen into place by pure luck, a high school and college drop out who struck gold when someone on the internet played him. Max was the real grafter in their partnership and deserved everything he'd earned.

"How about being happy, has that come true?"

"I would say that now I'm pretty happy most days."

"Well, most days isn't good enough. I'd like to be that someone who makes you happy and smile everyday."

Max raised an eyebrow, but there was no hiding the massive smile spreading across his face.

"I mean it," Nev reinforced and then Max leaned forward and kissed him. That made the majority of Nev's first date nerves disappear. He was pretty certain that Max wasn't having second thoughts about this whole thing. He just had to get through the entire date now without doing anything stupid or _too_ annoying.

"You're making me break one of my first date rules," Nev joked.

"And what would that be?"

"No kissing until maybe at the end."

"Ha! Crazy rule."

"Hey, I like to do things properly."

Max cheekily gave him a chaste kiss before putting the old school work back on the trunk and closing it. "Come on, we should probably get going." He jumped up and pulled Nev with him. 

Max turned all the lights off and retrieved his bomber jacket, gloves and wooly hat from the hook in the hallway. Nev watched him with a pleased smile. If he could get this right, tonight would be the beginning of forever with Max.


	7. SIX Part B

_November 23rd 2016_

_Manhattan, New York City_

_Somewhere midtown._

The car journey into Manhattan was full of idle chit chat about how the other's day had gone. This was the first time Max had ever been on a date with someone he knew so well beforehand and he found himself relieved that there was no need to get that awkward first date small talk out the way.

The drive took about 35 minutes as they just hit the ending of the rush hour traffic, it would've taken longer but Nev managed to navigate the busy Manhattan roads like a pro before parking down a side street. Max knew where they were, this was his old stomping ground after all. He was still none the wiser about where exactly they were going though. 

Nev led him down the street, Max could tell he was as nervous as him as he uncharacteristically had his hands stuffed in his pockets which was a sign he didn't know what to do with them, or he was consciously worried about making the wrong move.

"Here." Max held out his hand and there was no hesitation in Nev taking it in his own, but Max still asked, "is this okay?"

"Of course it is."

With Nev's hand in his own the walk to the destination seemed to take forever, even though it was literally just down the road. Max had decided to take the lead for selfish reasons, not to put Nev more at ease, but because he was curious about how he would feel walking hand in hand with him and he had to admit, it felt okay. Yet he couldn't help but keep his head down and glance around every so often to see if anyone was paying attention to them. Whereas Nev clearly didn't have such worries. Eventually the younger man stopped them outside a pizzeria that Max didn't recall ever visiting in his New York years.

"Frankie's Pizza Place," Max read aloud. He wasn't averse to a good pizza, he just never imagined this would be the place Nev would pick for their first date.

"Remember our first kiss?" Nev asked and Max nodded slowly. "Then I sort of asked you on a date and suggested you come by my work place after I knock off for the best pizza this side of Manhattan. Well this is it."

Max smiled, he changed his mind this was something he could definitely imagine Nev doing. 

Nev let go of Max's hand and held the door open for him, inside was not what Max was expecting. Outside it gave off that traditional old school Italian American diner look, but inside the top half of the walls not covered by wood panelling like the lower half were decorated in intentional graffiti of New York architecture. It was very well designed.

There was a bar along the back, but instead of sitting there to enjoy a nice drink you could watch several staff assemble your pizza and cook it in the big wood burning oven. It seemed like a pretty cool place.

Max followed Nev up to the end of the bar. A woman of about their age was sitting there engrossed on her phone. She didn't notice them until Nev loudly said her name, Adrianna. Her eyes lit up when she looked at Nev she practically jumped off the bar stool and into his arms, kissing him several times on each cheek.

"Yaniv Schulman, you son of a gun. Where have you been all these years?" The woman's accent was a thick mixture of Italian and New Yorker, Max was willing to bet she'd grown up here, but spent a lot of time around Italians, whip hadn’t shook the accent. She stepped back and gave him the once over with her eyes. Then reached up to ruffle his hair. "Look at you now handsome man."

"You're too kind Adrianna." Nev beamed. "How have you been?"

"I've been fine, Yaniv, still helping papa out here, but look I'm engaged now." She held out her hand to display a pretty nice rock.

"Adrianna," Nev hugged her again and beamed. "I'm so happy for you. I can't believe I'm probably the last to know."

"Yaniv, it's harder than you think trying to get hold of a global superstar."

"Global superstar is a stretch, but thanks. I'm sorry, I do get busy."

"Maybe I need to join the list of women who catfish you to get your attention." She laughed at her own joke and Nev playfully elbowed her.

They were cute together, Max couldn't help but wonder if they used to date.

"How about you Yaniv, have you settled down yet with a real life person?"

With that question it was as if Nev suddenly remembered Max was standing there, he smiled softly at him and then looked back down at the girl he still had his arm around. "Remember that guy I was kind of obsessed with back in the day."

"How could I forget," Adrianna rolled her eyes. "Big brother's best friend?"

"That's the one."

"Max was it? I remember papa going mad when you started spelling out his name on pizza with the toppings, insisting you was going to marry him. Please don't tell me you're still hung up on him."

Nev was going red and Max was trying not to laugh. Adrianna was on a role.

"I remember that one time I caught you-"

"Adrianna this is my cohost." Nev quickly interrupted and Max made a mental note to remember to find out what Nev was once caught doing.

Adrianna finally became aware of Max's presence and looked at him with the same friendly smile she'd given Nev. Then a look of realisation settled on her face.

"Max Joseph, no?"

"Yes." Max stuck out his hand and she shook it. "Nice to meet you."

"You're _the_ Max?" She looked at Nev when asking this.

"He is _the_ Max."

She looked back at Max. "You're the fairytale prince that stole my little Yaniv's heart."

Now it was Max's turn to go red. He'd never been referred to as a prince before, not when it came to affairs of the heart anyway.

"Adrianna split up with me because of you," Nev explained.

"Oh," Max felt his cheek's heating up even more if possible he really didn't know what to say.

"Oi, Yaniv. Don't make him feel bad." Adrianna scolded. "He and I went on like two dates and I just couldn't deal with him talking about this guy on stop. In the end, I told him that maybe he should take you on a date instead. Glad to see it worked out."

"This is actually our first proper date," Nev said, excitedly.

" _Eventually_ worked out," Adrianna corrected, then she wriggled out of Nev's hold and leaned over the bar. "Papa!" She shouted, "we have a special customer!" A few of the staff making pizzas turned round and rolled their eyes at her and she just poked her tongue out at them before hollering for her father again, this time saying something in Italian.

It worked; a guy appeared from out the back. A short stocky man, pushing about 70, grey hair and thick black moustache. Everything you'd expect an stereotypical Italian restaurant owner to look like. At first he looked annoyed at being summoned so loudly, but when his eyes looked upon his daughter his features softened.

"Papa, look who it is!" Adrianna said excitedly pointing at Nev. 'Papa' looked way less enthusiastic.

"Ahh, Yaniv Schulman. What have I done wrong to the lord to deserve this visit?"

"Papa, be nice, Yaniv is all grown up now."

The older man stared him down for a few seconds then let a small smile stretch across his face, he held out his hand to Nev who shook it then he then extended it to Max.

"Francesco Russo, but you can call me Frankie."

"Nice to meet you, Frankie. I'm Max," Max replied shaking the man's hand. He had a firm and intimidating grip, even for an elder. Max wondered how Nev had ever convinced this man to let him take his daughter on one date let alone two.

"Papa, you've seen Max before, he's Yaniv's partner on Catfish."

Francesco turned to Nev and crossed his arms. "So this isn't the same Max whose name I found you etching into a love heart into one of the tables?"

"Actually it is, sorry, sir," Nev looked down sheepishly at his feet.

"Well at least it's nice to know that you two stayed together."

"Actually this is their first date," Adrianna piped up. "Isn't it cute that Nev decided to come here."

"Ahh, young love never dies." Francesco smiled and his features completely softened. He turned to his staff and said, "one large Schulman special, Adrianna will tell you what to put on it and whatever drinks they want are on the house okay. They're our special guests for the evening."

"Schulman special?" Max questioned.

"Do you like meat, peppers and cheese?" Adrianna asked.

"Erm, sure I do."

"Well then you'll love this. Wine? Beer? Soda?"

"I'm driving, so I'll just have a cola," Nev replied for the both of them, "Max will have a glass of Frascati."

"Fras what?" Max raised an eyebrow, they'd lost him.

"Great choice," Francesco said heartily then with that they were ushered away. Max sort of wanted to see the pizza being made, but he knew he should probably pay more attention to his date than his food. Adrianna sat them in a booth in the furthest corner of the restaurant, the least busy area so they could some privacy, he was thankful for that.

They slid in opposite sides and when they were alone Nev started laughing, tapping at something on the corner of the table. Max leaned over to look and, lo and behold, etched into the wood was an small awkward looking love heart with his name inside with the 'X' a lot smaller than the 'MA' to make it fit.

"Incorrigible," Max chuckled, pulling his hat and gloves off, leaving his coat on. "They seem like really nice people here."

"Francesco is the best boss. He supported me when I was applying to college and even after all the bullshit trouble that I caused, I always had a job here."

Max was more than pleased to hear that Nev did have people on his side when everything was happening, despite them having spoken about it Max would always feel a little bad for not being around during those times. But he couldn't think of that now, this was a date, a time to look to the future.

Adrianna quickly arrived with their drinks and a plate of breadsticks giving them a cheeky wink as she left. Turns out Frascati was a white wine, a really nice white wine. Max had to stop himself from downing the whole large glass before eating anything. 

"Great choice of wine."

"I thought you'd like it. I was pretty crap at serving and helping make pizzas, but alcohol became my speciality."

"Why am I not surprised, I'm not complaining though." Max quickly ate a breadstick for an excuse to drink more wine.

"I don't know if you're just really nervous or you really like that wine," Nev commented as he chomped on his own breadstick.

Max didn't reply, he just chuckled, it was in fact a bit of both. He drunk the wine slowly so he could calm himself down without having to talk, then had a few more breadsticks in a feeble attempt to counter the wine's effects. He didn't know why he was suddenly so nervous, it's not like he had to try and get Nev to like him, that was already set in stone. But what if Nev done something to irritate him and he overreacted and then fucked everything up.

What if he drunk too much and said something stupid? Maybe he should stop with the really good wine and go with soda instead.

Also, what if someone saw them? Wait, that was stupid, he'd already held Nev's hand in public earlier and didn't even care when Nev had told Adrianna and Francesco they were on a date. It just seemed so normal, but now he was actually thinking about it, it was making him anxious. A few haters he thought he could handle, but thanks to the grand invention of the internet everyone would know. His entire family thought he was straight.

"I need to use the bathroom," Max suddenly announced.

"Okay, it's just over there." Nev pointed across the room.

Max weaved through the tables quickly not giving anyone the chance to stop him if they did recognise him and then looked over his shoulder to see if Nev was looking, he wasn't. Instead of going into the bathroom Max slipped outside. He moved away from the windows of the restaurant and leaned against a wall.

He took deep breaths, this certainly wasn't the effect of one glass of wine. It was almost as if he was going to have a panic attack, something he hadn't had in many many years. The horrible feeling passed as quickly as it came though, thank god. He managed to control his breathing and focus and fortunately it worked.

"Fuck sake," he cursed into the night. He mentally kicked himself, how the hell was he meant to look to the future when he couldn't even face the guy that was his future. He had to get over this ridiculous fear, he knew there was nothing to be worried about, but his brain wouldn't let him process that. He actually found it kind of fucked up that one moment he was ready to let Nev take him on the floor of a photography studio and then the next he couldn't even enjoy dinner with him because of the small chance someone might react negatively towards him, towards _them._

This was one of them times he wished his brain would just slow down and stop over analysing everything just for a moment or two.

"Hey, Prince Charming, you okay?"

"Huh?" Max turned his head, it was Adrianna. "Oh, yeah, I just needed some fresh air."

"Good, I saw you leaving, thought you was doing a runner on our Yaniv."

"I'd never do that," Max said almost a little too defensively. He sighed upon realising she was waiting for an explanation. "I'm just a bit nervous," he admitted.

Adrianna rubbed his arm. "He's probably just as nervous as you are. If he's the same old Yaniv who used to spell your name out on anything he possibly could he's undoubtedly just as terrified of messing this up."

"You're right," Max sighed. "This is also the first time I've ever been like out on a date with a guy. Sounds stupid, but I guess I'm worried what people might say." He but the inside of his lip. "Or do," he added quietly. He hated them bastards that attacked him years ago and he hated himself for not being stronger, fighting back more; taking them to court at least. If he'd known they'd effect his time with Nev perhaps he would've tried some more. 

"People are always going to be idiots, Max. They're always going to find something to hate. Are you really going to let that get in the way of you and Yaniv being happy?" She paused and looked at him for a response, but carried on when he didn't reply. "Plus no one could possibly hurt you with Yaniv at your side. That boy is scrappy and loyal; he'll always fight for you. As long as you have each other, that should be enough. Fuck everyone else."

_'Fuck everyone else.'_

She was right.

There was a brief silence as Max absorbed the woman's words. She spoke sense, it was what he needed to hear. It's what his brain needed to hear, everything that he was trying to relay across to it himself but couldn't. She hit the nail on the head. He took her by surprise and pulled her into hug. "I can see why Nev likes you."

"Shame, he likes you more." Adrianna replied. She sounded as if she was teasing, but still Max had no words to reply to that, he squeezed her thankfully and then marched back into the restaurant like a man on a mission.

"I was just about to send out a search party." Nev said upon his return.

"Sorry, I bumped into Adrianna on the way. I like her, she's cool." With new found confidence and Adrianna's words echoing in his head, Max finally shed his jacket and threw it across the seat, then instead of sitting down there he slid in next to Nev. "You don't mind?"

"Not at all," Nev grinned. "I got you some more wine, pizza will be here soon."

"Thanks." Despite his earlier resolution to switch to soda, Max couldn't resist taking another sip of the good wine whilst Nev seemed dedicated to finishing all the breadsticks. Max just watched him.

"You're staring," Nev pointed out when he eventually noticed he was being watched.

"I can't help it, did I tell you how fucking good you look this evening."

He said that, Max really just said that outloud in public. His voice didn't even crack and his mouth didn't go dry. He liked the ever so tiny smile that flickered across Nev's face at his words whilst he tried to play it cool.

"Mm- thanks." Despite the smile, Nev eyed him up suspiciously and crunched down on the rest of the breadstick in his hand. When Max rested his hand on his thigh he visibly started chewing slower.

"Can I like kiss you right now?" Max asked abruptly. "I know Nev Schulman doesn't like to do such debauch things on the first date, but since we've already broken that rule I'm hoping he'll make more exceptions."

Nev slowly chewed the remainder of the breadstick in his mouth and swallowed hard. "I will definitely make exceptions for you." He looked down at the hand on his knee then he locked his brown eyes with Max's, a sincere look took over his pretty features. "But are you sure? I know the restaurant isn't busy, but we're right by the window and you don't have to if you're not ready. Like I'm not expecting you..."

"Shut up, Nev. Fuck everyone else." 

Max very much enjoyed embracing Adrianna's blunt yet empowering words and with that he kissed Nev. He rapidly decided that this was his new favourite way to get him to stop talking.

"Wow, well that was nice." Nev straightened up the collar of his shirt and swigged a mouthful of cola. "I don't know what's in that wine, but I am definitely investing in a few a bottles."

"You make it sound as if we haven't kissed before," Max said.

"Kissing you is always nice like it’s the first time." Nev gave him a coy smile before picking up his cola.

It was pretty insane how the simple compliment was more than enough to make Max feel on cloud 9. It was pretty insane how Max was only just realising that Nev was pretty perfect for him. He had found someone who was talented, funny, loyal, good looking, who was willing to be the perfect gentleman and pick him up. Someone who wanted to make him happy. Someone to love him unconditionally.

Someone who he loved, unconditionally.

"Nev, I love you."

It felt like the entire restaurant went silent when Max said that. For a few seconds he thought that he'd just imagined saying that as Nev took a while to react, but when the dark haired man choked on his soda and nearly dropped the glass it was obvious he had heard.

Max really hadn't planned to drop such a. bombshell on the first date. Maybe Adrianna had instilled too much confidence in him. Although it wasn't like he hadn't really thought it over repeatedly in the time since the photography session, because he had. He just hadn't come to any clear conclusion whether it was love or lust, or more like he just had still refused to admit it to himself that it was the former. Either way he'd now admitted it to not only himself, but Nev too.

"Did you just say-"

Clearly, this definitely did not fit in with Nev's first date outline.

"Yeah, I did." There was no point denying it unless he wanted to look like a complete maniac.

"Wow. That's kinda big."

"Kinda is, isn't it?"

They were cut off by Adrianna arriving with the 'Schulman special' pizza. It was massive and loaded with extra cheese, extra peppers, extra pepperoni, extra chicken and crispy bacon. It was definitely special and had Nev written all over it.

"Enjoy boys, if you want anything else you know where to find me."

"Thanks," the two men said in unison.

"Perhaps we should eat this first and then go and talk?" Nev suggested. He hadn't completely freaked out or bailed, but there was no way Max was going to be able to sit through eating this entire thing without his paranoia going into overtime before he got a response from Nev.

"Do you love me too?"

"You really think you have to ask me that question?"

"I really need to hear _you_ say it."

They looked at each other dead in the eyes, Max was worried he looked really vulnerable, he hated being in such a position; he'd gone from being super confident to putty in the younger man's hands yet again. Nev bit his bottom lip and opened his mouth to say something, but instead he turned back to the pizza.

"Maybe a couple of slices first, I've been thinking about this all day." He pulled a slice out and grinned cheekily at Max. "I really love pizza, I'll give you that."

Max rolled his eyes and elbowed him in the ribs, that didn't stop Nev eating though. So the he decided to tickle him, and the younger boy quickly gave in.

"Okay, okay," Nev laughed taking a bite out the pizza slice he'd expertly managed to protect during his assault. "I love you nearly as much as I love this pizza. Is that good enough for you, Maxie?"

"I hate you, Nev."

Max smiled as he subconsciously traced his finger over the little etched love heart with his name in the middle, it was more than good enough.


	8. SIX Part C

_November 23rd 2016_

_Manhattan, New York City_

_Rel Schulman's old apartment._

"You do realise that my brother doesn't live here anymore."

"Of course I know that."

"So why are we here?"

"Because, you said that Rel owns this place now and lets it out."

"Yeah."

"Well, I'm going to need you to pretend to be him and get the people to buzz us in. You sound alike."

"But why?"

"Because."

"'Because' isn't an answer, Max."

Max just grinned and pressed the buzzer on the apartment buildings again and again and again until someone answer. Nev should've never introduced him to that white wine, when Max suggested they continue their date else where this is not what he had in mind.

Nev found himself being yanked towards the intercom where a man shouting hello was barely audible through the small speaker. He looked at Max and sighed nothing that he owed him one for this. "Hey, this is Ariel Schulman. I need you to let me up, sorry, no keys on me."

"You're the best," Max said happily when the door opened. They both remembered the way; penultimate floor, take a left down the hall when you leave the elevator.

"C'mon Maxie, just tell me why we're here when we both have perfectly empty places we can go back to." 

"But I want to go back to the start."

"Did you just fucking quote a Coldplay song?"

"No. I. Fucking. Didn't."

"I think you did."

"Ahh, shh." Max pressed a finger to Nev's lips then banged on the door in front of them. It didn't take long for someone to answer. 

It was a young man who answered. His clothing wreaked of rich hipster kid and his eyes and the smell from inside gave away the fact he was high. It was as if Nev was looking at himself twelve odd years ago. 

He looked back and forth between Max and Nev several times before speaking. "You're not Rel."

"Clearly," Max impatiently, said. "I'm Max and this is Nev."

"Okay are you Brad's friends?"

"No, this is Rel's brother, Nev."

"I don't really know Rel's family, sorry, he didn't say anything about you coming by."

Max exchanged a look with Nev. Nev expected him to give up and leave, but instead he wasn't having any of it.

"Max and Nev the Catfish guys. Come on, even if you don't know us you must've heard of the show."

"Nope, sorry. If you wait a minute, I can call Rel. What did you guys say you wanted?" He stepped inside and left the door wide open. "Hey Brad have you seen my phone? Got a couple of fisherman here, one says he's Rel's brother. You seen them before?"

Nev peaked over Max's shoulder into the apartment and there was another young man sitting in the armchair playing some sort of first person shooter game on a PlayStation 4. He waited until he was killed before looking up at the two of them.

"Ryan," he said, setting the controller on a side table next to a bong, "bro, that's Max and Nev." He jumped up and gestured for the two of them to come in. "Are you guys like looking for a catfish? Are we going to be on TV."

"No, no." Max shook Brad's hand. "Rel, Nev's brother, just asked us if we could get to the balcony and take some photos he needs for a project as he's not in the area."

"Rel didn't mention it," said Ryan as he moved cushions on the sofa around presumably looking for his phone.

"He's really busy at the moment, must have slipped his mind."

"You know us," Nev chipped in also shaking Brad's hand. "We've no reason to lie to you."

"I guess." Brad shrugged, he didn't take any convincing, in fact he seemed more interested in getting back to his video game. "In that case come with me." 

Max and Nev followed Brad down the hall and into the master bedroom. He fished some keys out of his pocket and proceeded in unlocking the door to the balcony.

Nev looked around, a calming sense of nostalgia fell upon him. The room was still minimalistic like Rel had kept it. There was few changes though, floorboards instead of carpet now, brand new furniture and a bed of course. There was also a few band posters on the wall surrounding a giant tv. He wondered what his own old room now looked like, perhaps he could take a sneaky peak before leaving.

They thanked Brad as he left them and then stepped outside onto the balcony. Nev was instantly thankful that Max had dragged them up here.

"Still fucking gorgeous," Nev commented, taking in the view that he was once obsessed with. Just like the room, it hadn't changed much; a few more skyscrapers here and there and some big neon company signs had been replaced with others, but it was still _their_ Manhattan. 

"Can you believe we were just dumb kids when we were last stood out here together." Nev stretched out his arms and let the cool night's air hit him. "Well I was dumb anyway."

"I was pretty stupid too, evidently." Max leaned against the railing and looked up into the sky, the stars echoed the lights of the city below it, it was spectacular. "Smart Max wouldn't have left you hanging for twelve years, that's for sure." He rubbed his hands over his face and yawned muttering an apology for it and Nev just smiled. The wine was clearly wearing off.

"And smart Nev wouldn't have waited around for twelve years," Nev said, "But hey, look where being dumb has finally got us and I'm not complaining." It was evident that Max wasn't really ever going to get over leaving Nev that night, no matter how many times they spoke it over. Nev was willing though to reinforce how much he'd moved on.

"You are one hell of the optimist, Nev, that's for sure."

Nev chuckled and leaned next to Max. "I used to come out here a lot to contemplate life. Rel eventually gave up trying to stop me. If I'd had a particularly bad day I could spend hours at a time out here uninterrupted."

"What did you think about?"

"Everything. Myself, what the hell I was doing with my life. You; of course. How to improve the Nev Special pizza. Dude, I even came up with the names of my future kids."

"Oh, you want children."

Max sounded a little taken aback, but they'd already exchanged 'I love you' on their first date so Nev might as well be upfront and honest about everything else.

"Yeah," Nev shrugged. "One would be nice, but I've always really wanted at least two."

Max didn't say anything at first and Nev worried that maybe he'd scared him off a little, but just as he was about to quickly change the subject it seemed Max wasn't that scared.

"So what names did you come up with?"

Nev grinned, "Yaniv Schulman Jr for a boy and Maria Louise Schulman for a girl."

Max slowly raised and eyebrow and laughed, shaking his head. "You do realise there is no way on Earth I'm going to let you name our son Yaniv Jr. I don't mind Maria though, that's a nice name."

"Our son," Nev muttered quiet enough to go unnoticed. The words repeated over and over again in his head.

In this moment everything was perfect, nothing could ruin it. He wished that he could go back and tell his teenage self, who was standing up here contemplating life, that everything would turn out okay with Max and the years of worrying would be for nothing. He looked at the grey haired man and saw his future, but not only that, he saw his past and present too. The only person more consistent in his life than his brother and parents was Max and he was happy that's what life had given him.

"Hey, Nev." Max turned to face Nev and took him by the hand. 

"Yes, Maxie?"

"I think you might just be my type you know."

Nev chuckled. "That's good because I think, H Maxwell Joseph, that you might just be my type too."

With his free hand Nev knocked Max's hat off so he could run his fingers through his hair and went to kiss him. He was stopped by the vibrating of Max's phone rattling against the railing.

"Sorry," Max smiled. He whipped the phone out of his pocket. "It's Rel, wonder what he wants."

Nev couldn't help but laugh, even when he could be there in person Rel was imposing on their intimate moments. As Max checked his phone, Nev took a moment to look at his own and was intrigued to see that he too had a message through from his brother.

"Did you tell Rel about us?" Max suddenly asked, shoving his phone under Nev's face.

"What, no, I wouldn't do that."

"I mean, I don't mind. I'd understand if you spoke to him, I know you're close."

Nev read the text on Max's phone aloud, "Yo, Max!! Hope you and Nev are having fun this evening. Try not to break his heart or if you do at least record it for some sort of catfish movie sequel."

"Maybe the stoner worked it out and told him."

"I doubt, but that text is very general like he doesn't mention he knows we're on a date, probably just Rel teasing. Figured we're hanging out in New York together." Nev raised an eyebrow thoughtfully and moved onto his own text from Rel. "Bro, can't believe you didn't tell me about you and Max hooking up. Don't screw this up. Call you tomorrow." Now both his eyebrows shot up in shock. "Okay. How the actual fuck-"

"I take it you haven't looked at twitter this evening?" Max commented as he scrolled down the app, his eyes widening at whatever he was reading.

"No," Nev's phone had been on silent all evening plus he had his notifications turned off purely because of the sheer amount he received. He opened the app and first noticed the unusual amount of direct messages he'd received, but before checking them he went to his notifications. The first thing he saw was a multitudes of comments on a post he had been tagged in.

He opened it up and saw that he'd been tagged in a whole thread posted by a '@reyjose1995' that was blowing up. 

_'Yooooo, the catfish guys have just walked into Frankie's pizza place @MaxJoseph @NevSchulman.'_

_'Are they gay? They looking pretty damn close up at that bar. My girlfriend wants to ask for a photo.'_

_'They've sat down now. If you're reading this bros come and say hi!! My girl loves you'_

_'Max just walked past our table. I can see why my girlfriend is making heart eyes at him. He smells good, can't lie man.'_

_'Ya boy is going to go talk to them because all for m'lady, wish me luck.'_

_'YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Max and Nev are deffo getting their thang on. You kids have fun. Sorry @laylatay100 next time, babe.'_

Attached to the last tweet was a clear photo of Max and Nev in the booth kissing. It currently had 9562 likes and over 10k retweets. 

"Well then," Max said as he scrolled down his own twitter feed. "Looks like the cat is out the bag."

"I'm sorry."

"No, no it's fine." Max tapped his screen, "these comments are all pretty supportive. The world was going to find out sooner or later." Max locked his phone and then changed his mind and unlocked it again. "Hey, you want to take a photo?"

Nev was surprised at the sudden change of topic, he was certain that Max would be having some sort of crisis at the fact they'd just be outed to the world. "Of course." Nev held his hand out for the phone. "Do you want the city in the background."

Max snorted and yanked Nev close to him. "Doesn't matter what's in the background as long as you're in it."

Nev didn't question Max's motives, he quite liked the idea of having a photo memento of their first date. The first snap was awkwardly positioned and so Nev took up position behind Max, threw and arm over Max's shoulder and pressed their cheeks together. They looked cute on the little screen as Max clicked away. Max had a content look across his face and Nev looked ecstatic.

"Send me those," Nev said afterwards as Max typed something away on his phone. Max just nodded and finished what he was doing before looking up.

"Retweet what I just tagged you in."

Nev hoped it was a meme. He fully appreciated a relationship based on sending memes to each other. He pulled his phone back out and reopened twitter. 

This was way better than memes.

Max had tagged him in one of the selfies they'd just taken with the caption, '@NevSchulman kissed me for the first time on this balcony back in 2004. Seemed only right we came back for our first date #HappyWednesday'

Nev couldn't like it or retweet it quick enough. "Well, that's a thing now."

"Yeah. Wow." Max took a deep breath. "Seeing as we've been caught red handed might as well own it, but I never imagined I'd come out over Twitter."

"Well it is 2016. Are you that surprised?"

"True," Max shrugged. "I should probably call my parents tomorrow."

"It'll be fine," Nev said and he knew it would. Max's parents were super cool and accepting of everyone, plus they doted on their son.

"How about your parents?"

"I think they'll be relived. They're always dropping hints about how 'the lovely Max is still single and eligible'. I'm sure Ariel said something."

Max laughed and went back to leaning on the railing. Nev watched Max's tweet briefly as the likes, retweets and mentions came rolling in; unsurprisingly there were quite a few comments from users stating their confusion as they thought the two of them had been a couple since season one. Unfortunately, albeit unsurprisingly, there were also quite a few comments expressing dismay at two guys hooking up, some tweets more derogatory than others. He wasn't about to point them out to Max right now though. If he had it his way Max would never read them.

But that wasn't possible.

There was going to be some sort of sadness from Max caused by the hate even though he'd pretend to brush it off at first, it would surface eventually. Nev knew him all too well. Just like he knew how nervous Max had been at the start of the evening and how he definitely hadn't excused himself to go to the toilet. Of course he wouldn't make Max feel uncomfortable and bring that up, he was just pleased that whatever pep talk Max had given himself at the restaurant worked. He was even more pleased that Max wanted this and felt ready to tell the world about his sexuality and their relationship. So Nev was ready to do everything in his power to stop Max from regretting making that decision.

He put his phone away, he'd check on the tweet later. Instead he looked at Max. _His Max._ How anyone could want to hurt something to precious was beyond him.

"So, Max, does this mean I can call you my boyfriend now?"

"After just one date? Bit fast," said Max. The tone of voice would've worried Nev if it wasn't for the grin that accompanied it.

"You told me you loved me and we debated names for our children. In fact forget boyfriend, I should probably be proposing right now."

Max raised both eyebrows and rubbed his chin. "You're right, let’s start with boyfriends. But you have to ask me properly, since you're being the perfect gentleman."

Nev rolled his eyes and feigned annoyance, when in fact he'd practised this in front of the mirror many times for when the day finally came. He over exaggerated clearing his throat and took a deep breath. "H Maxwell Joseph, I'd say we've been seeing each other for quite a while now, but we haven't so bang goes my cute romantic speech so straight to the point, will you go steady with me?"

"Go steady," Max repeated. "Who the hell still says go steady?"

Nev scrunched up his face and pouted, "I think it sounds cute."

Max cupped Nev's face with his glove clad hands and pressed their foreheads together. "You're cute," he muttered. "Of course I'll go steady with you, Yaniv Louis Schulman."

Nev was so delighted it masked out his cringing from hearing his full name. He almost expected fireworks to go off in the background like a cheesy romcom or a predictable slow burn fanfiction. Of course fireworks didn't happen, in fact Max didn't even kiss him opting instead to pull him into an embrace.

Right now it felt better than a kiss though, as it was the sort of hug that Nev had long yearned for from Max. One that wasn't a friendly 'bro' slap on the back kind of hug, or reserved for when the other needed comfort, or in moments of joy and congratulations where they'd got caught up in the moment. No, this this was hug purely to express affection. Nev was living for the way Max's arms wrapped around him, how he could feel his body relax against him and his chin resting perfectly on the crook of his neck.

"Thank you," Max mumbled, his warm breath causing goosebumps on the on Nev's neck. "For everything, for bringing me out here during Rel's party, for not giving up on me and for just being you and for being so easy to love."

Max's kind words pulled at Nev's heartstrings and he could feel tears welling up in his eyes. "I love you Max, more than anything. Even Frankie's pizza."

Max laughed and Nev quickly brought his hand up to wipe his eyes before Max broke the hug. With a smile on his face, Max took Nev's hand and led him back into the bedroom. He sat Nev on the end of the bed but he quickly had to shuffle back when Max advanced over him. Soon Nev was sitting up against the head board and Max was straddling his hips, stripping them both of the first layer of garments; shoes, coats, hats and gloves. Then Max pulled off his sweater and discarded it on the floor.

Nev lifted his arms so Max could pull his sweater off too and the older man seemed pleasantly surprised to find he was wearing nothing underneath it. Max had wonderfully curious hands and Nev enjoyed watching him as he explored his body, he enjoyed the feel of Max's finger tips delicately touching him.

"Do you really want to do this right here, right now?" Nev asked, even though he knew the answer.

"Yup." Max pulled his t-shirt off and Nev reached out to run a palm over his chest, but Max didn't let him have too much fun. He took Nev's hands and pinned them above his head.

This was extremely exciting.

Nev was a thrill seeker and the idea of getting it on with Max in his brother's old room now inhabited by someone he didn't know, completely done it for him. Rejecting Max's advances at the photography studio the other day had been harder than he let on, but now he knew that Max wasn't just using him to let out frustration there was nothing to stop them.

They hadn't even kissed and he was getting turned on. It had been a while for Nev though, a long while; five months and sixteen days to be exact with the last person he'd dated and since he'd sworn off of one night stands and there was no relationships afterwards he'd been living a life of celibacy since. He shifted under Max's weight to try and relieve some pressure but all that happened was he groaned when he accidentally rubbed himself against Max's thigh. There was no hiding the bulge in his ridiculously tight jeans.

Nev couldn't take this anymore, he freed his hands from Max's grasp and with one hand around his waist smoothly flipped them round so now it was Max with his back to the mattress.

"So what do you want, Max?" Nev licked his lips and toyed with the waistband of Max's boxers that was poking out from his jeans.

"Y-you." Max stuttered, breathlessly. 

"Yeah, but what do you want? Do want to be fucked Maxie, think you'd like that?"

"I-I..." Max couldn't find the words, he just nodded slowly as he trained his eyes on Nev's hands that were undoing Max's belt then the button and zipper on his jeans. Nev leaned forward, one hand clutching the headboard for balance and the other one slipping into Max's now open jeans.

They both gasped when Nev came into contact with Max's growing erection over the thin material left between them.

"I promise I'll make you feel good whilst you're screaming my name into that pillow." 

Nev grinned, he'd had many years to work on his 'dirty talk' since that embarrassing attempt as seen in the Catfish movie. There was also considerably less pressure without your brother shoving a camera in your face and knowing the world was going to see. It was clearly totally working with Max, the way he was now thrusting his hips up to cause friction where he needed it the most against Nev's palm.

Nev was close to pushing the jeans and boxers down to give Max what he wanted, but not before a kiss. That didn't happen though.

"Look guys, Rel just text me and told me to tell you to get out of his bedr... Woah, fucking hell!"

Nev looked round at the stoner standing in the doorway and rolled off the bed onto the floor.

"Oh my god dudes, really? Brad just showed me that tweet and it was cute and all, but do you have to do this in my bed? Man, those are clean sheets."

"Sorry," Nev said, sitting up on the floor. He located Max's shirt and sweater and threw it up to him and put his own sweater back on. "Tell Rel he's a dick."

"Are you like really his brother, man?" Ryan asked, leaning against the doorframe. He took the joint that was tucked behind his ear and promptly lit it. Taking a long drag before continuing. "You really don't look like him."

Nev scrunched up his face. Was this guy for real? "Have you honestly never watched or heard of Catfish?"

"I told you bro. I'm not into all that marine life stuff." Another drag. "But isn't it so cool to have a brother that's a director? I love them Paranormal Activity films."

Apparently this guy was for real. Nev laughed to himself and stood up. "You know how these celebrity types are. So high maintenance. Anyway if you just give us a moment we'll straighten everything up and leave. Again, really sorry."

"Don't sweat it I guess." Ryan waved the joint nonchalantly in the air. "Brad seems to know you from the fishing scene. We've got some people coming round for some drinks, music, a smoke. If you want to join us, seeing as your Rel's brother after all. No more funny business in my bedroom though." 

"Erm... Thanks." Nev held out his hands apologetically. "And no more, we promise."

"Cool." Ryan turned to leave the room, but then stopped to add. "You think you could get me a discount for rent?"

"Maybe." Nev lied, there was no chance.

"Thanks, fish dude."

Ryan shut the door behind him and Nev turned the light on. He looked at Max who was still shirtless and sitting on the end of the bed doing up his belt. They both started laughing. 

Nev crawled on the bed and settled himself behind Max, stretching out his legs either side of him, massaging his shoulders and running his hand through the back of his hair. Max sighed contently and titled his head back. 

"It's seems we're destined not to do it in this bedroom."

"Not to worry, there's always my place or yours later. Or I can even get us a hotel room."

"I like that plan."

Nev snaked his arms around Max's stomach and hugged him from behind. "We should stay here though for a bit first, like Ryan offered."

"Really, Nev? You want to crash a twenty year olds party."

"Hey, you was the one that insisted we come back here. And what's more of a throwback than being at a party here together. It's perfect."

"You just like to party."

"And there's that."

"Fine, an hour max then we're getting out of here."

"Deal. And I'll make sure to reward your patience later on." He whispered in Max's ear and he felt the man shiver. No matter how much Max tried to take the lead he was always putty in Nev's hand and frankly, Nev wouldn't have it any other way.

He got off of Max and the two of hem finished getting dressed. Whilst Max tidied up the bed, Nev looked in the mirror at the dressing table. He fixed his hair and rolled up the sleeves of his sweater debating internally whether they looked cooler rolled up or rolled down.

"You look fine," Max said walking up behind him as he pulled the sleeves down. "Perfect even."

"Thanks," Nev smiled, leaving the sleeves down. "Come on, let's go socialise. Our first official function as a couple."

"Hold up," Max said, taking his hand and stopping him from leaving. "I know you're staying here now until we start filming again, but I'm meant to fly back to LA on Friday."

"Oh yeah," Nev suppressed the frown that wanted to emerge. He'd chosen to forget the fact that Max still had work to do back home. "We can Skype and text." 

What Nev really wanted to say was that he would drop everything and come with him. But despite all the advances they'd made this evening he was wary of coming across _too_ clingy, he knew Max liked his space.

"Actually, I'm going to cancel the flight."

"Oh."

"It's a project where they don't really need me and it'll be nice to actually enjoy a break once without too many side projects. Plus, if I fuck off to LA it might just be another twelve years before our second date."

"Wouldn't want that."

"Definitely wouldn't."

Max squeezed his hand and led them out the room. 

This was it, this was the future that teenage Nev standing on the balcony had wished for and it was only just the beginning.

~ END ~ 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone that stuck with this story and thanks to those who left feedback! Hope you enjoyed and I done them justice! I'd really like to know what you thought about the end, what you liked and disliked overall and whether I should write some sort of sequel! 
> 
> Most of the information I got about Max and Nev's past I slipped in throughout this story, from little tidbits such as the book in Max's box of memories which I discovered was the book that sparked his interest in the industry are receiving it as a gift at 14, or bigger things Nev's time in school and constant troubles, came from really long research including finding Max's old MySpace, articles written from when they were in school and achieving things and old interviews etc (totally in a non creepy way all the stuff was online public and I didn't have to deceive anyone into getting access haha I just spent a lot of time on google lol), so anyways I hope I wrote them as close to how they come across as possible! (Also I have loads of ideas for them now and I think it would be a waste not to put it to good use and write a sequel if people want that ;D)


End file.
